This page is going to be chock full of panels, 10 in fact. There isn’t a lot of copy to be lettered so all of the images should fit.
- - -
1. These first four panels should be small, a trio across the top of the page. Clark Kent sits at his desk. His shoulders are slumped as we see him in profile. His computer screen is illuminated but he doesn’t look engaged.
Caption: Friday morning.
2. On Clark’s breast pocket we see a red stain starting to spread out. His pen is leaking.
3. Lois walks past Clark, she’s in a hurry.
Lois: Clark, you’ve got red on you.
4. Clark throws his pen down with one hand while his other hand is raised in disgust as he looks at his shirt.
5. These next three panels should form the next row. Clark whistles while casually walking to the bathroom, hoping no one looks at his red stain.
6. We are looking at the Daily Planet from the outside and Superman has smashed out of a window and is flying straight up into the sky.
7. The world spins around fast with Superman zipping around it like he’s those arms that spin around an atom. We see him in three different places at once, he’s that fast.
8. These three panels should form the final row. Clark is back at his desk, though this time he’s standing as he takes a red pen from his breast pocket, his chair has been pushed back behind him.
Caption: Friday morning – do over.
9. Clark passes Lois as she’s walking to the left of the panel, he has the pen in his hand.
10. Clark hurls the pen out a window and into the sun.
Caption: Revenge is a dish best thrown into the sun.
I'm a fan of multiple panels (obviously). You're able to tell so much more story, and it worked well for Moore.
ReplyDeleteI like this script Ryan. Tell me, the "You've got read on you" line - Shaun of the Dead?
One thing I have always wondered though - how does spinning the world in a counter rotation reverse time and space?
Hey Ben, thanks man, I went with more panels on this none because it didn't need a great scope of scene, nor do I think it'd need Jim Lee style art.
ReplyDeleteThe Red line is from Shaun of the Dead, wasn't sure how long it would take someone to get it, well done.
I have no idea how spinning around the world reverses time, and by no means does my use of the function endorse its physics. I just thought it was funny, while on the phone to my brother we came up with heaps of different scenarios that could involve this basic structure, there were some funny ones, but plenty not fit to print, ha.
Loved this.
ReplyDeleteThere's something about Lois's nonchalant attitude at the start that is so Margot Kidder / Erica Durance, I could hear both of them saying it.
The spinning the world backward to reverse time routine is without doubt the most risible part of Superman The Movie, and yet perfectly fits the "anything goes" problem with this character. I loved the idea of Clark going to that extreme just to save his shirt. That'd be a Superman to read about!
Dude I still think he should have given the pen to Jimmy!!!!! haha Although I do like the Revenge dish quote at the end!!!!
ReplyDeleteAlso the Lois as the revenge angle was good!!!!
Overall you set it out neatly and reads very well!!!!
Well played!
Heh, this made me chuckle, good stuff!
ReplyDeleteGreat take on Superman for someone who finds the DC universe mostly "bleh". Fun read!
ReplyDelete