This page has a single wide panel at the top, followed by two rows of three equal sized panels and finishing off with two panels down the bottom which are of the same size.
1. A wide panel. We are at street level looking up at the buildings. A small boy, dressed in a green jacket, looks up in amazement as people rush past him. He is looking at a giant robot (one that you may see in the old 1950’s sci-fi movies) smashing its arms into buildings, sending debris to the ground. What the boy cannot see, but the reader can, is that one of the robots arms has smashed the building directly above the boy, and debris is rapidly descending towards him.
2. We see a close up of the child’s face. It is half covered in the shadow of the rubble that is making its way down to him. The boy is looking up, mouth wide open and unsure as to what to do.
3. This is a side shot taking in the previous two panels. We are at street level, seeing the full body of the boy looking up, and the debris inches away from engulfing him.
4. The same panel, with the debris almost hitting the ground. However, the boy is not in the panel, and a blur of red and blue streaks from one side of the panel to the other, as if something very fast has just dashed by, and we are unable to see it.
5. A panel that mimics the previous panel of the close up on the boy’s face. It isn’t as tight, and we can see that the boy now stands on a roof top. His mouth is again open wide, this time in amazement. Off panel comes a speech balloon, simply saying “Are you ok?”
6. A full body shot of Superman, hovering in the air. His cape is blowing to the left and out of the boundaries of the panel. In the background to the right is the robot, which is tearing its way through Metropolis. It is obvious that Superman has dropped the boy on a roof top on the other side of the city.
SUPERMAN
I’ll be back for you.
I’ll be back for you.
7. This panel is the same as the previous, however Superman now has his back to us as he flies in the direction of the Robot. We see his cape, the ‘S’ symbol clearly visible.
8. We are in a darkened room, illuminated only by the thousands of television screens which plaster the only wall we can see. From behind we can see the full body of a man, standing watching the largest of the screens. The smaller screen show news channels from around the world. The large screen shows the panel we were just looking at. However, the image is coloured green and slightly pixelated. On Superman’s left shoulder, near the “S" logo, is a bright, shining green mark. The words “OBJECTIVE COMPLETE” are written across the top of the screen.
9. We have a tight short of the man’s face. It is Lex Luthor. He has a smirk on his face.
LEX
All too easy.
All too easy.
Wow, I must have even less knowledge about Supes than you because I'm stumped.
ReplyDeleteI like this page and am intrigued to know exactly what would happen next. I love the idea of the robot flailing around, that sort of thing always gets me. However, I do feel like there are too many panels for the one page, or more accurately, your panels try to convey too much for the short space they would each be given. Otherwise, I like the idea.
Parasite?
ReplyDeleteI reckon you could get most of this on 1 page, but panels 1 and 8 wouldn't leave much room for the others.
When I say it "could" be the origin of one of Supes heroes, it would be in terms of a retcon the size of which we have not seen outside of Smallville. Even then, I'm probably way off the mark. I simply saw a character while doing research, and tried to work him. Most likely way off the mark, but meh.
ReplyDelete@Ryan - very good point. I do tend to have a habit of trying to cram a lot into my scripts, and I suspect that they may come across as disjointed when read by others (?) Reading this script, I can see that panel 2 was not needed.
Any other suggestions on how I could have made this leaner?
@Rol - Parasite isn't the villain whom I had in mind.
ReplyDelete