The Punisher - Cleansing Rain - Matt Duarte

The Punisher in “Cleansing Rain” by Matt Duarte

This scene takes place in the world of Punisher MAX. There are no superheroes to be found here, just Frank Castle, his guns, and the scum of the Earth. The narration is by Frank Castle.

Panel 1

Description: This is an image as seen through binoculars. There’s two guys standing in a park at night, drug dealers, talking to two very nervous teenagers. There’s some drops of rain falling in the scene.

Panel 2

Description: Also seen through binoculars. It is now raining very heavily. The two drug dealers from earlier are running away from the park, in the direction of the viewer of the binoculars (Frank).

PUNISHER (Caption): I’ve never been a big believer of the “cleansing rain” concept.

Panel 3

Description: This panel is seen through a windshield of a car. The rain is falling heavily on it, with the wipers on. We can see the driving wheel, with two big hands holding it. The two drug dealers from earlier are getting into a car.

PUNISHER (Caption): The way I see it, all that water does is move the filth around to other places.

Panel 4

Description: This panel is also seen from the same view as before, though the car is now in a different place. The two drug dealers are parked in a suburban home, getting off the car and into the house. It is still raining heavily. They are trying to cover their heads as they run, and you can see that they are both carrying weapons in their waist bands.

PUNISHER (Caption): It has it uses though. If all the filth is in one place, the cleanup goes a lot faster.

Panel 5

Description: This panel is seen from a scope, though it is not circular, but rectangular. We can see a window, with the two drug dealers from earlier, giving part of their earnings to a big fat guy, the leader of this little gang of drug dealers. He is wearing ostentatious jewelry, and is waing around an assault rifle recklessly. There is still rain falling, though not as much as earlier.

PUNISHER (Caption): There’s also the filth that is just too thick for plain rain to get rid of.

Panel 6

Description: Same window as before, though we are not seeing it through the scope anymore. All three of the drug dealers are looking out the window, with horror in their faces, and screaming in terror. About to fly in the through the window is a rocket that has just come out of rocket launcher, with smoke trailing behind the shell.

PUNISHER (Caption): The kind that needs something a little stronger to remove it.

The End.

The Punisher - The Pun-Isher - Ben Rosenthal and Danial Carroll ART!

Click the image for a much larger one!

This page has the esteemed honour of being the very first thoughtballoons art page so far in our illustrious history. Ben Rosenthal provided the script, which you can see here, and a pretty constant play-at-home scripter, Danial Carroll, handled the art duties. I think the team up works great and I also hope to see plenty more artists come along and help us out. We've got plenty of words on the site, we could always use a few more pictures.

The Punisher - Blood Simple - Max Barnard

The Premise: The Punisher went blood simple, taking out anything he saw in a deluded rage brought on from his years of endless assault against criminals. Marian, a pure-hearted New York rookie cop, has encountered the now distraught Frank Castle in an abandoned warehouse.

----------------------------------------------------

Page One - 6 Panels

1-- An exterior view of a dishevelled warehouse on an anonymous street at night, with boarded-up windows and a half-destroyed sign that we only know ends in "ORP". Other than this sight all we can see is a lamppost, illuminating the panel, and a police car parked near the entrance to the warehouse.

TEXT BOX/NARRATION - When I got the call I couldn't believe it.


2-- We're now inside the darkened warehouse. Through a single beam of light coming through the window we can see Marian, a young, neat and prim police officer, who at best can only be described as looking average, standing alone and strong. There is literally nothing else you can see other than that and the window responsible for the aforementioned beam of light.

TEXT BOX/NARRATION - Frank Castle is turning himself in. But only if it's me (and ONLY me) who comes to collect him.


3-- Marian whirls round, drawing a stun gun from a holster on her waist (motion lines galore?), aiming it at Frank Castle, who is sitting on the floor next to a small lamp, which is just about illuminating his form, and a pistol.

SPEECH BUBBLE/MARIAN - FREEZE!

SPEECH BUBBLE/FRANK CASTLE - ->hhh<-

SFX/LAMP - klik!

4-- Nothing in the scene has changed, save Marian's hands shaking some small amount.

SPEECH BUBBLE/FRANK CASTLE - You're late, officer.

SPEECH BUBBLE/MARIAN - GET UP! Y-You're under arrest!

TEXT BOX/NARRATION - Somehow I didn't even consider...


5-- Frank has his hand on the pistol on the floor, and is beginning to lift himself up off the ground.

SPEECH BUBBLE/MARIAN - GET YOUR HAND OFF THE GUN! MOVE IT! I-I'M WARNING YOU, CASTLE!

SPEECH BUBBLE/FRANK CASTLE - You're a good cop. The least corrupt I could find. Heck, you're practically a saint...

SPEECH BUBBLE/MARIAN - W-what?!

TEXT BOX/NARRATION - That when it comes to dealing with Frank Castle...


6-- The Punisher is now standing up, brandishing the gun handle first at Marian, who is so surprised that her stun gun has fallen out of her hands. A small detail is that we can see some small tear streaks dried on Castle's face.

SPEECH BUBBLE/FRANK CASTLE - I've gone too far. I've killed innocents. So now I need you, an innocent, decent police officer, to finish me. Put a bullet in my brain, Officer.

TEXT BOX/NARRATION - You never know what's going to happen.



[Bonus note: The rest of this storyline would be a locked room debate with Marian wrestling with the request she's just been given, something that could even have the effect of turning her herself into a new Punisher. With that potential ending to the story I suppose you could consider this a first page of a #1, a new Punisher series giving us a new Punisher with a different angle. Which I, at least, think would be bloody captivating!]

The Punisher - Punish Me! - Rol Hirst

Panel One.

Night time. A haggard-looking, middle-aged man sits across the table from us in a diner. He's Jerry, and he's telling his shameful story. He looks like a man on the verge of a breakdown, running shaky fingers through his thinning hairline, unable to make eye contact with us. We can’t yet see what's on the table in front of him.

JERRY: Fourteen years – what is that, the seven year itch times two? But me and Sooze, we just weren’t connecting any more, you know?

JERRY: I can’t remember the last time we went out on a date or even sat and watched a DVD together… and as for sex…

JERRY: I’m not making excuses. I know it was wrong. I knew it every second I was with Kelly… but she made me feel good again. Even when I was feeling bad about going behind Sooze’s back, I still felt better… more alive that I had in years.

Panel Two.

Wider angle so we can see the table now. Jerry’s coffee sits untouched. He pushes a gun towards us. He’s looking at us now, imploring us…

JERRY: I bought this gun to make amends. Not to protect myself from Sooze – she’s past trying to hurt me. That one time she did, she’d just found out about the affair… she wasn’t thinking straight.

JERRY: If that little kid hadn’t got in the way, I’d have got what was coming to me right then and there. But he did. And now we both have to live with the consequences.

Panel Three.

Now we see the diner table from side on. Jerry pushes the gun towards the man sitting across from him: Frank Castle, the Punisher. We can just make out his skull shirt peeping out from under his trenchcoat. He’s frowning: stock Frank Castle expression #1. He reaches to take the gun.

JERRY: But I can’t do it. I just… I don’t have the strength. That’s why I came to you.

Panel Four.

Close on the Punisher. He stares at Jerry’s gun in his hand.

FRANK: You did the right thing.

Panel Five.

Castle stands up and steps out of the booth, away from Jerry, slipping the gun into his belt as he goes. Jerry calls after him, shocked.

JERRY: What… wait… where are you going? You can’t just…

Panel Six.

Close on Jerry, distraught, in the doorway of the diner now, calling after the Punisher.

JERRY: You… You’re the Punisher…

JERRY: Punish me!

Panel Seven.

The Punisher walks away, leaving Jerry behind him in the diner doorway, a broken man.

FRANK: I am.

The Punisher - Bad Company - Simon McDonald

1. Frank Castle is standing over the gravestones of his family, arms hanging loosely by his sides, a handgun clasped in his right hand. It's a gloomy, fairly archetypal day for a visit to the cemetery; overcast, threatening rain. His jacket is zipped up; the insignia that strikes fear into the hearts of criminals is hidden - this is not the appropriate place for it.

HENRY TRAVERS

[off panel]

It's difficult, isn't it?

2. Frank turns his head; an old, frail looking man, visibly struggling to remain upright even with his walking stick, is approaching him, a sad smile on his face.

HENRY TRAVERS

Being alone.

3. Frank, not one to engage in such discussions, refocuses back to the gravestones. But Henry Travers doesn't take the hint and takes up a position beside Frank, held up precariously by his walking stick.

HENRY TRAVERS

My Claire...

She's been gone seven years now, and still I wake up every morning expecting to see her by my side.

I still find myself making tea for two.

4. We're looking at the graves; at the gravestones of Maria Elizabeth Castle, Lisa Barbara Castle and Frank David Castle Junior.

HENRY TRAVERS

[off panel]

We never had children.

Tried, sure; a number of times. I suppose it just wasn't meant to be.

But we had each other and that's all that mattered, and then one day...

5. On Henry; he's tearing up at the memories.

HENRY TRAVERS

One day she just left me.

Passed away in her sleep.

I said Good Night to her and when I woke up there was no Good Morning, there was nothing, there was just...

Just me.

6. Henry's looking at Frank, who has remained stoic throughout this conversation.

HENRY TRAVERS

But see, I'm an old man.

You, you're young enough to find someone again. Young enough to find a few more years of happiness.

You don't want to live your life alone, son.

Not if you can help it.

7. Tight on Frank. Cold, emotionless.

FRANK CASTLE

I'm not alone.

8. He holds up the gun for Henry to see.

FRANK CASTLE

I've got all the company I need right here.

END.

Will Turner- The Punisher- The Cycle

PANEL 1- Frank Castle shoots a man in the chest, who falls to the ground.
Caption: It burns you up inside, doesn't it, Frank?

PANEL 2- Frank Castle has his arms around a man's neck. In the background, a woman
with blond hair is in tears, reaching out to ask him to let him go.
Caption: But you know that no amount of death will bring them back.

PANEL 3- Frank Castle dangles a man over a cliff.
Caption: To you, they are all criminals.

PANEL 4- A sniper rifle sight is aimed at Frank Castle's back.
Caption: They call you The Punisher.

PANEL 5- From a rooftop A beautiful woman with blond hair is poised with a sniper gun. Frank Castle's back is facing her. She looks extremely angry.
Caption: "Judge not, lest ye yourself be judged..."

The Punisher - Pretty Funny - Ryan K Lindsay

1. Frank Castle stands on a pier dock. There’s a boat on fire in the water, dead bodies on the dock and in the water, and a flaming plane just crashing into the water about 100m away making a big splash. Frank has one gun in his hand, his other hand is quite clearly broken, fingers protruding everywhere like someone just tried to assemble a quick hand out of whatever they could find. We can’t see Frank’s face, he is looking out at the plane.

SFX: Crsplanksh

2. Frank is walking away, towards us.

Frank: Guess you should have answered that call.

3. Frank is still walking away, he’s just that bit closer to us. It’s over, they’re all dead and he can leave now.

4. Frank is closer again but this time looking down at one of the bodies. One of the dead bodies is not so dead and the guy is saying something.

Guy: Was that a joke?

5. Frank shoots the guy in the head twice.

SFX: Blam! Blam!

6. Frank is closer to us still, the smallest smile on his face. 

The Punisher - The Pun-Isher - Ben Rosenthal

A few years ago I wrote some sketches. Some were filmed, and some were not. The following is one of a series of 6 sketches that were not. Eager to get some use out of old material, I have re-written the first script in comic form. If you're lucky, I may post the other 5 movie scripts.

The following takes place in an alternate reality. In this reality, Frank Castle’s family was killed in an entirely different way...


1. A side view of the fridge section of a supermarket. We can clearly see rows and rows of different cheeses stacked in its shelving. In the middle of the isle is MAN 1. He is yelling, with a look of pure anger on his face, at the cheese. In the background is MAN 2, walking up to MAN 1. He is dressed in typical supermarket worker attire.

MAN 1
YOU FLITHY, DISGUSTING, BOTTOM FEEDING, B#$%T C$#@ SMOKER.

MAN 2
HEY!

2. The panel shows both men, from chest up, looking at each other.

MAN 2
Why are you yelling at cheese?

MAN 1
Because I’m lactose intolerant!

3. Both men are laughing hysterically. Their hands are on their bellies, heads are thrown back and mouths open wide. A tear may even appear on one of the men’s faces as they are laughing so hard. However, a red dot is visible on MAN 1’s forehead, but neither individual has noticed.

MAN 1 and MAN 2 (joint speech bubble)
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

4. Same framing as the previous panel, except MAN 2 is looking across in shock as MAN 1’s head has been blown away. We can still see the body of MAN 1 from the chest up, as the shot has only just been fired.


5. A wide panel. The Pun-Isher is standing menacingly with a cold, heartless stare. He wears a black trench coat, with a back t-shirt. There is a skull of a clown painted on this shirt. The smoking gun tells us that this is the man who shot MAN 1.

TEXT BOX
When his family was killed by a joke gone wrong, Frank Castle swore he would never let anyone make bad jokes again. Vowing to avenge his family by killing those who mis-use the power of the punch line, he became THE PUN-ISHER.

TEXT BOX
See, violence IS funny. Kids, try this at home.

Why The Punisher?

Picture this – you are enjoying a day out at the park with your family. Your children play as you hold the love of your life close in your arms. Her warmth and your children’s joy help to silence the horrors of war for just a little while. That is until you stumble upon another type of war. Witnessing a mob-hit, you watch helplessly as everything you have ever dared to love is gunned down before your eyes. Criminals take everything from you. You want to return the favour.

This is the reality which Frank Castle lives in. Driven to avenge the death of his innocent family, Frank is a man obsessed. He will bring down every criminal, crime boss and drug dealer...and will die trying.

While we have dabbled with villains here at thoughtballoons, it has all been pretty PC. Having The Punisher as this week’s character, I’m hoping our team of fantastic scribes plunge to the darker depths of their minds. Could they show the serial killer Punisher portrayed in Garth Ennis’ MAX run? Will they favour the black humour side of the character? Or will they completely sell out and do a FrankenCastle story? Only one way to find out True Believers, and that is to visit back each day this week as we bring you...The Punisher.

If you're interested in reading some other awesome Punisher stories, written by some other people who are also good, then click some of the links below, and each click and purchase (and you can purchase anything, so long as our link to Amazon is your portal) will help us here at thoughtballoons make a little scratch to get by. Thank you in advance:

The above post is Dolph Lundgren approved

The Penguin - Guests Posts

It seems we have some very talented readers within the thoughtballoons community who like to play along at home and post their own scripts. This week they've posted their scripts in the comments section on the Why Penguin? post, but I thought it would be nice to give them some play up here too, so hit the jump to read 'Gone Fishin'' and 'I Couldn't Draw To Save My Life' from Danial Carroll (the man also responsible for the wicked new banner we've been using these past few weeks). And in future, if you want to play at home post your scripts in that character's Why? post and we'll comment on it and maybe I'll even do another post like this, if I get the time.

The Penguin - A Bird Without a Hand* - Simon McDonald

*Inspired by Rick Burchett & Bill Sienkiewicz*

The following page is set out in a nine panel grid. The page should replicate this.

1. The Penguin is partially buried under the debris of The Iceberg Lounge; his head and an arm is poking out from the rubble, covered in dust; a cut to his forehead is dripping blood. He looks in bad shape; lucky to be alive, to have survived whatever's caused this decimation.

THE PENGUIN

Uuhhhh...

2. Identical to above.

SFX

Tap Tap Tap Tap

3. Same shot as above: only now there's a person standing in the frame; a man with a walking stick. We're staring at his legs; we can see The Penguin staring at those legs, hopeful of rescue.

THE PENGUIN

Huhhhhhlp meeee...

MAN

You want my help?
That depends...

4. The Man's now crouching down; looking at The Penguin with disdain. We can't see his head, but he's old and balding; like he needs the walking stick, it isn't just for show.

MAN

... how can you help me?

5. Close-up of The Penguin, eyes bulging. He knows the Man's face from somewhere... but can't quite place it.

MAN

You... do I...
I know...
You...

6. Tight on the Man.

MAN

Karma's a bitch, right?

7. Pull back, similar to Panel 3. Focus on the Man's leg's and the walking stick; on the Penguin, still trapped.

THE PENGUIN

I'm sorrrrry....
Please helllp meee....

8. The Penguin's gone limp, unconscious. The Man has moved out of frame.

MAN

(off panel)

Help yourself.

SFX
Tap Tap Tap Tap

9. Replicate Panel 8; the Penguin, unconscious. Alone.  Dying? Dead?

THE END?

The Penguin - Are Penguins Furry? - Max Barnard

The Premise: You wanted confidence? I'm giving you confidence in the SCARIEST WAY, as I exploit those most terrifying of internet people, furries and otherkin. Not because I hate them (though my opinion of these people is more than a little bit in the disgust category), but because this story just came to me on Monday morning, as I contemplated whether I could use some free time on my week off of writing to.. write. So here's a story about Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot, finally finding that place he TRULY belongs.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 1 - X Panels

1-- A close-up of Penguins face from the nose up. His brow is furrowed, in a way that could potentially be read as angry, to build up the expectations of the reader.

TEXT BOX/PENGUIN - No, no, this isn't right at all...


2-- We move back to see Oswald at a computer in a dark room, frantically typing away with a cigarette in his mouth and his top hat falling off of his head. He isn't wearing ANYTHING else, so make sure he's as disgusting, wide, riddled with cellulite and wrinkly as possible. Oh and sweaty, I'm sure someone out there will hate us for that, so have rivulets of thick sweat running down his hideous rotund form. We want to be giving people nightmares with this image!

SPEECH BUBBLE/PENGUIN - BIGGER! It needs to be BIGGER!


3-- We're now looking over the Penguin's shoulder at his computer. On the screen is a character creation screen for a game called FURQUEST (drop this in at the top of the screen. In fact if you're looking for a frame of reference for the screen itself, try looking at character creation screens from such games as World of Warcraft. It's the kind of shut-in vibe I'm going for here). The character pictured on screen is a horrific sight: a giant anthropomorphised Penguin-man/woman with ridiculous muscles, to the extent that its flippers look like bulging, Liefeldian biceps. It's wearing a tank-top to cover it's hideously oversized breasts, which are almost as big as the rest of the character. Between the monstrosity's legs is a MASSIVE BLACK CENSORSHIP BAR, with CENSORED in big white letters running along it. I don't think you need to know what this implies, but rest assured that by the standards of the community I'm light-heartedly mocking it's tame.

SPEECH BUBBLE/PENGUIN - HUAGH! It is complete!


4-- I'm sure you're beginning to feel sick at this point, so be glad this is the final panel. We're now only viewing the screen, which is displaying the aforementioned fur-futa-penguin... THING standing in a crowd of similar creatures, namely Foxes, Cat-people and some sort of reptile. Try to have one of them giving an incredibly uncomfortable arse shot facing the reader. In the bottom left corner is a chat box, containing such generic sentiments as "a/s/l", "lololololol" and "roflcopter".

SFX/ABOVE CROWD OF PLAYER CHARACTERS - YIFF YIFF YIFF YIFF

TEXT BOX/PENGUIN - I've finally found a place I truly belong, where no-one will think I'm disgusting!* HUAGH!

TEXT BOX/EDITOR'S NOTE - *Urp! I feel sickened by the irony!

TEXT BOX - Fin


[Man, I feel filthy writing that, but I wanted to see how far I could push the envelope on uncomfortable scripts. Hopefully you all laughed on some small scale, or at least scarred you for life. Because that's a sort of comedy. And this TOTALLY isn't existing just because it's the only idea I could think of for the character. Not at all!]

The Penguin - Friends - Rol Hirst

Panel One.

Batman is fighting the Joker at Gotham City Zoo. They’re in the Aquatic Birdhouse where the Joker is trying to feed his deadly smiley-faced Joker-fish to the assorted birds… including swans, geese, pelicans, flamingo, etc. Batman is leaping towards the Joker to stop him.

JOKER: Come on, Bats – fish is good for bird-brains! Hahahahaha!

CAP: Breakfast – The Joker attacks Gotham Zoo…


Panel Two.

Batman is fighting Killer Croc in the sewers. A hole in the sewer wall leads through to a bank vault. Killer Croc has Batman in a bear hug, squeezing the life out of him.

CROC: Rarrrrrghhh! KILL YOU!

CAP: Lunch – Killer Croc breaks the bank… and almost does the same to my back. (Once was bad enough.)


Panel Three.

Batman is fighting the Mad Hatter amid giant Alice In Wonderland style teacups. The Hatter is throwing razor tipped Oddjob hats at Batman while a swirling hypnotic beam emanates from his own top hat.

MAD HATTER: Time for your afternoon nap, Batman, old chap – you’re feeling sleeeeepy!

CAP: High tea – of course, it had to be the Hatter…


Panel Four.

Batman is fighting Poison Ivy in a huge, plant-filled greenhouse. Batman is trying to keep himself from being chomped by a giant venus flytrap. While Batman struggles, Ivy blows him a poisonous kiss.

IVY: Darling – I could just eat you up!

CAP: Dinner - Poison Ivy’s latest creation debuts at Gotham’s Botanical Gardens.


Panel Five.

Batman is tied to a target / bullseye on top of a building as night falls on Gotham. The Joker is pointing a ridiculously huge gun at him and is about to blow him away. Batman is struggling to get free but his situation seems hopeless.

CAP: It’s relentless. As the day goes on, they begin to wear me down …

CAP: So that by the time the Joker returns for supper… he finally gets the better of me.

JOKER: Say goodnight, Gracie!


Panel Six.

Big SFX panel – BLAM!


Panel Seven.

The Joker stands with a smoking bullet hole through his chest. He’s staring at it in confusion. Batman is unharmed… staring past the Joker to where the Penguin waddles out of the shadows.

JOKER: Eh?


Panel Eight.

The Joker collapses. As the Penguin comes closer, we see that his umbrella is smoking from the shot he just fired at the Joker. Batman starts to struggle free from his trap.

BATMAN: Oswald…?

PENGUIN: I’ve told him before… He can do what he wants to you…


Panel Nine.

Penguin beats the fallen body of the Joker with his umbrella repeatedly.

PENGUIN: BUT HE - MUSTN’T – EVER – HURT – MY --


Panel Ten.

Back to Gotham Zoo as featured in the opening panel. Police and zoo-keepers clear up the mess from the Joker’s attack earlier in the day. Among the debris and Joker fish, a zoo-keeper holds the body of a dead penguin.

PENGUIN (CAP): FRIENDS!!!

The Penguin - Cold Blooded Killer - Matt Duarte

The Penguin in “Cold Blooded Killer” by Matt Duarte

This page is to be set in two different panels. It is not set in any particular time period. In my mind, this would be drawn by someone like Marcos Martin, or Javier Pullido, if that helps to visualize the image.

Panel 1

Description: It is the inside of The Penguin’s office, which is extremely luxurious. There is artwork on the walls, sculptures in the floor, and a very nice desk in the middle. The Penguin is sitting in the chair behind the desk, though we can only see his head and arms, as he is too short for it. At the same time, however, he is pacing nervously around the desk. He is also looking out a window that is on the far side of the room, looking rather gloom. It’s not that there’s three different Penguins, but rather that he is moving around the room, from the desk, to walking around it, to finally looking out the window. In the center of the room, there is a shadowy figure, a hulking mass compared to the tiny Penguin. He has his back turned to us, and we cannot see who it is just yet.

PENGUIN (from the desk): Allow me to preface this meeting by expressing my disgust with you. Despite what you might have heard, I do not associate myself with cold blooded killers such as yourself.

PENGUIN (walking): Even meeting you in person goes against my baser instincts, the very order of nature itself! We may feed from the same waters, but do not fool yourself, in any other time we would be blood enemies! And yet...

PENGUIN (from the window): The Bat has been targeting me particularly hard lately. My money and influence only goes so far and that damned flying rodent knows exactly where to hit me the hardest. I need something else, something that you can provide.

Panel 2

The Penguin stands in front of the big man that we saw before, with his back towards the reader. The Penguin’s arms are open, as if extending his gratitude. In front of him, stands Killer Croc, wearing a tattered orange jumpsuit with the word “Arkham” in it. He is also wearing some extremely heavy shackles that hold his arms and his legs together, as well as a mouth guard keeping his mouth shut. He towers a good four feet over the tiny Penguin.

PENGUIN: So what do you say, eh? We didn’t break you out of prison for nothing! With my brains, and your brawn, I’m sure we can give the Bat a run for his money. All you have to do is promise you will behave, and do as I say, and we’ll remove those shackles from you.

Next: The Bird and the Reptile vs The Mammal!

The Penguin – March of The Penguin - Ben Rosenthal

The following is a very simple 3 lined grid, with 2 panel appearing on each line. All panels are of the same size.

1. We see a young Oswald Cobblepot. He is around 15 years old. He is dressed in a karate Gi and is training with a similarly aged young man. There is determination on his face.

2. This panel shows Oswald and his friend looking down on some blueprints. Both boys are a few years older, with Oswald looking slightly chubbier around the face. On the bench in front of the two are miscellaneous parts of an umbrella, as well as some rotator blades and engines. We can see that the blueprints reveal that the two are working on a portable way of flight.

3. We have skipped forward another few years. This panel has a slightly more rotund Oswald running towards us, down an alley. He is dressed in mostly black, with a ski mask rolled up over his face. He has just committed a robbery of the local bank. Oswald is looking over his shoulder with a smirk on his face, carrying a bag close to his chest. To the left of the panel, in the background, two police officers are pointing their guns at Oswald’s friend, who is dressed the same as Oswald.

4. Once again a few years have passed. Oswald’s belly is the size that we see it today. He is dressed in nice clothes, but not the expensive suit we are used to seeing him in. He is looking over the fallen body of a nicely dressed mafia-type boss. The body of the mafia boss is lying on its back at the bottom of the panel, with Oswald standing above it, one foot on its chest. Oswald has a large grin on his face, holding an unopened umbrella in his hand which is still smoking from its tip. Behind Oswald are a group of thugs, looking like Oswald’s army.

5. This panel is taken up entirely by the front page of the Daily Planet. Its headline reads in a large font, “WHO IS THE PENGUIN?” Underneath is the smaller line “The mysterious new Emperor of Crime”.

6. This panel is taken up with Oswald’s face. He has a monocle and cigarillo jutting from the right side of his mouth. We can see the outline of the Daily Planet, which Oswald has obviously just been reading. Oswald looks completely gobsmacked and taken aback.

OSWALD
I’m a penguin?

Will Turner- The Penguin- Our Feature Presentation

PANEL 1- The Penguin is dancing around a fifties style street, twirling his umbrella and prancing about in heavy precipitation. To further hammer home this reference, we see musical notes and the caption "I'm singing in the rain"

PANEL 2- First person view, like in Goodfellas. A bouncer smiles at The Penguin as he holds a note in his flipper.

PANEL 3- The Penguin, Two Face, Clayface (modelled on Sammy Davis Jr, but around the edges the clay residue gives away his real idendity) and The Joker strut like the original Frank Sinatra Oceans Eleven.

PANEL 4- The Penguin is poised at a lectern, passionately pointing his umbrella out to the crowd. Behind him is a giant poster reading "Vote Penguin" a la Citizen Kane.

PANEL 5- A dingy, cold apartment, with mould on the curtains and DVDs strewn across the floor, the discs seperate from their boxes. The Penguin is on the floor, dressed in a torn tuxedo, his umbrella dusty on a broken umbrella stand. He scowls at a DVD with a very familiar black shape on a yellow circle.

Caption: I could have had class. I could have been a contender. If it wasn't for that damn bat!

The Penguin – Hunting Trophy – Ryan K Lindsay

1. Detective Driver is standing at the crime scene, his arms crossed, his face sullen. A new junior detective, Hungerford, is approaching him. There is a body covered by a sheet on the ground on which we can see has a fair blood stain spreading out from the side of the body’s stomach.

Hungerford: Came as quick as I could. What have we got, Detective Driver?
Driver: They took his umbrella, one of his crooked little paws, and what must be at least a pound of blubber.

2. Hungerford looks perplexed.

Hungerford: Blubber?

3. Driver grimaces and has turned away.

Driver: Whales ain’t the only ones, buddy.
Driver: Looks like a trophy hunt to me. And I know someone who apparently has a very rich collection in this sort of sick vein.

4. Driver is staring off, looking through a note pad, Hungerford is staring at the sheeted body, which is now slightly moving.

Driver: Massive coins, pet dinosaurs, glass cases of defeated foes, crocodile teeth necklaces, pits to regenerate himself…giant ten pins. It’s all just a big game.
Penguin, under the sheet(faint): Waugh, Waugh…
Hungerford: Oh, god, he’s still alive.

5. Driver is walking away, the penguin has sat up with the sheet uncovering his face, Hungerford just looks shocked.

Driver: He was never dead, I was just sick of lookin’ at him.
Penguin: Waugh!
Driver: C’mon kid, we need some truth on this matter, and though I doubt we’ll completely get any it’s still our job to go ask questions.

Why The Penguin?

There are a few reasons why I went with this character. On the one hand it was the first name that came into my head! I also felt a lot of people picked Marvel characters, so I thought I'd go with a change.

But I'm also intrigued by the various interpretations of the character. In the film Batman Returns, he is an embittered monster trying to become respectable. In the 60's series he was a squawking eccentric, while in The Batman he was an oik pretending to have class.

I've got to be honest, there is also a joy in writing for villains, be able to get a sense of why they do what they do. It seems to me you rarely get villains that are evil for the sake of it and that often adds to the fun.

If you are interested in reading some more, professional, Penguin tales during or after this week then please check out the links below, there might just be something new for you...you never know, and each click and purchase (and you can purchase anything, so long as our link to Amazon is your portal) will help us here at thoughtballoons make a little scratch to get by. Thank you in advance:

    

Aquaman - Benthos - Matt Duarte

Aquaman in “Benthos” by Matt Duarte

This page is to be set into four different panels, two by two grid. It is not set in any specific time. The font should in a typewriter-looking style, as it is an official log of events.

Panel 1

Description: Aquaman is diving into the ocean from a medium sized research boat. He is wearing a small headpiece and a belt with some equipment on it. Looking from the boat are several other people, not sailor-types, but rather scientists and navy officials.

Caption: August 14th, 1997

Caption: After two days of travel, we have reached the approximate point where the mysterious sound that our scientists heard earlier this month seems to have originated. Codenamed “The Bloop”, we were sent to investigate it’s origin hundreds of kilometers off the southeast coast of Chile. Because of concerns it might be other worldly in nature, we requested a liaison from the Justice League of America to approach the site first.

Panel 2

Description: Aquaman is diving straight down deep into the ocean, passing a giant squid.

Caption: Aquaman traveled with us in the boat to maintain his strength for the deep dive once we reached our destination. Even for someone of his strength, going thousands of meters down into a low oxygen zone is a dangerous enterprise. We tried to outfit him with the latest localization and communication tools at our disposal, but he said he brought some of his own.

Panel 3

Description: Aquaman is investigating a deep trench, which is noticeably darker than the rest of the ocean floor, he is about to go in there.

Caption: Communications held nicely throughout the descent. The low temperatures and high pressure made the communication crystal clear, at least until Aquaman descended into the trench he found somewhere around the 5000 meter mark . We had no topographical maps or any kind of previous information about it, which suggests it might have been recently formed.

Panel 4

Description: Aquaman is in complete and total darkness, with the exception of a ball of light, roughly the size of a beach ball, floating directly in front of him. He is extending his hand, as if to touch it. Behind him, we can see a faint outline of giant set of jaws, with sharp and long teeth, opening, as if about to swallow him whole.

Caption: We lost communications with Aquaman two hours ago. At first we thought it might have been a simple glitch in the communicators, but as more time passed the whole crew grew concerned. We are now preparing the bathyscaphe for the biggest dive it has done so far. Let us hope that we find Aquaman safe and sound.

Caption: And let us hope that we don’t find whatever it was that made the mysterious sound.

To be continued!

Aquaman - It's A Pun, You Sea - Max Barnard

Premise: Aquaman is looking for some Whales. He has arrived at a location he got a tip-off about and is now at some docks. WARNING! Some sentences may translate poorly or incorrectly. Deal with it!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Page Two - 4 Panels


1-- Aquaman is standing at the edge of some fog-laden docks, talking to a heavily bearded man in full fishing regalia. He is gesturing towards the ocean wildly.

SPEECH BUBBLE/AQUAMAN - WHALES! DO.... YOU HAVE... WHALES?!

SPEECH BUBBLE/FISHERMAN - 'ch re yn sefyll ynddi, boyo!


2-- Aquaman is now looming over the man, yelling louder, in the vain hope that this crosses the language barrier.

SPEECH BUBBLE/AQUAMAN - BIG SPURTY THINGS! SING BEAUTIFUL SONGS! WHALES!

SPEECH BUBBLE/FISHERMAN - dawelu i lawr, boyo!


3-- Aquaman is now 'facepalming', shoulders slumped slightly in failure. The Fisherman is now walking away.

SPEECH BUBBLE/FISHERMAN - idiot bysgota ddyn

SPEECH BUBBLE/AQUAMAN - *sigh*... Never mind...


4-- Aquaman is now swimming past the Severn Bridge some time later, having given up and deciding to leave. There is a prominent sign at the end of the bridge that says "Welcome to Wales", with "Croeso i Cymru" just below it on the sign. Ah, Bilingualism!

SPEECH BUBBLE/AQUAMAN - I can't believe the tip-off I got was wrong...

TEXT BOX - FIN!*

TEXT BOX/EDITOR - AHA! ANOTHER PUN!

Aquaman - In Deepest Doodoo - Rol Hirst

Panel One.

The bottom of the ocean. Aquaman sits on a coral reef, chin resting in his hands, sulking. A large fish swims towards him.

FISH: Hey, Aquaman.

FISH: Aquaman, hey!

Panel Two.

Aquaman ignores the fish. The fish shouts louder.

FISH: AQUAMAN!

Panel Three.

Disgusted at being ignored by the King of the Seas, the fish swims away.

FISH: How rude…

Panel Four.

Mera swims towards Aquaman, looking worried. Aquaman continues to sulk.

MERA: Orin… what is it?

AQUAMAN: I’m fed up, Mera. Everyone treats me like a joke.

Panel Five.

Mera sits on the rock and tries to comfort her husband. He’s not easily consoled.

MERA: They don’t treat you like a joke.

AQUAMAN: Yes, they do. I’m just the guy who talks to the fish. I can’t turn on the TV without someone making an Aquaman gag. Seinfeld, The Simpsons, South Park – even the Barenaked Ladies did that song about me summoning fish to the dish – I’m sick of it!

Panel Six.

Close on Mera, a caring expression on her face.

MERA: Come on, Orin… it could be worse.

Panel Seven.

Close on Aquaman, incredulous.

AQUAMAN: Yeah? How!?

Panel Eight.

Aquaman and Mera are still sitting on the coral reef, but we see them from behind in this panel. Mera puts her arm around her husband. They haven’t noticed yet, but a rotting shark carcass is swimming towards them.

MERA: Imagine if you could only talk to dead fish…

CAPTION: TO BE CONTINUED – IN 'BRIGHTEST' DAY…

Aquaman – The Duality of Duality – Ryan K Lindsay

1. We see an underwater town. It’s like an Atlantean wild west town, and there’s no one around.

Caption: Some horrors leave their imprints on the earth.
Caption: You see the soil after a battle and it is ripped apart with the anguish of souls and minds.

2. Aquaman is walking through the ‘main street’ of the town. We only see part of his body in this panel but we can clearly see that he has a harpoon instead of a left hand. There is a red light coming from down the street on the right between two huts.

Caption: There is a change that violence makes on the world and it can rarely be undone.
Caption: What is destroyed cannot so easily be replaced by something new.

3. Aquaman is walking towards the red light coming from down the street. We can see the determination on his bearded face.

Caption: The scar is forever. The reminder is eternal.
Caption: What would be the opposite of violence? Creation? I doubt it.

4. Aquaman walks up to the structure that is emitting the red light. It is a massive red coral structure that’s part Cronenbergian mess and part Dali-esque children’s play equipment

Caption: One man’s black will always be another’s white. Duality is what makes the world work; yin and yang, night and day, air and water …

5. While bearded Aquaman looks at the red structure another Aquaman, a clean shaven and more pure Aquaman comes walking around from the side of the structure. He seems to have a strange cruelty in his eyes, even though he’s smiling.

Caption: It’s by having differences that we forge the world.
Caption: Even if that difference is good and evil. It’s a breeding ground for heroes and villains, the myths we learn from. The legends we become, and destroy.

Bearded Aquaman: Hey, stranger.
Caption: Because one side will always have a time of dominance. The vacuum of peace is only the brief interlude between more struggle. That is the truth, and the lie.

Aquaman - Problems - Ben Rosenthal

This is again a 3 line grid structure. The first two panels are on the first line of the grid, and are of the same size. Panels 3 – 5 are on the second line, and are of the same size. Panel 6 is on the last line of the grid, and takes up the width of the page.

The following takes place in current continuity, shortly after the happenings of Blackest Night.

1. Close up of Aquaman’s non-bearded face. So close, that we can only see the beginnings of his hair line at the edge of the panel. He is looking straight ahead, a look of worry on his face.

CAPTION: “I have a problem.”

2. A wider shot of Aquaman now. We can see his whole body, and he is standing in a sandy place. They are in a desert in Texas. We can see that Aquaman has his back to a stalagmite, with his arms tied behind his back. He is being held in place by a large, metallic device.

CAPTION: “I’m trapped, 50 miles away from the nearest body of water...”

3. This panel is shown from behind Aquaman. We can see the side of the back of his head, as well as the stalagmite he is tied to, at the left of the panel. Taking up a majority of the panel is the man who has tied Aquaman up - Captain Demo (Captain Demo is a villain who dresses as a pirate and has a hook for a hand. You can see a confusing image of him here). Captain Demo is holding his hooked hand up high, with an evil smirk of triumph on his face.

CAPTION: “...meaning I cannot use my powers to call on any sea creatures to help me.”

CAPTAIN DEMO
I have you now, Aquaman.

4. Same panel as above, however the smirk has gone from Captain Demo’s face. He is looking around confused. The ground is shaking, as if there is an earthquake

SFX: Grrrrrrrrrrrrumble

CAPTION: “But that’s not my problem.”

5. A simple panel showing a close up of Captain Demo’s feet. There are cracks in the earth between them.


SFX: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRUMBLEEEEEEEE

CAPTION: “My powers...”

6. The largest panel of the page. It shows the fossilised skeleton of a plesiosaur bursting through the ground. In its teeth is the screaming Captain Demo, blood seeping from his mid section from where the teeth of the ancient dinosaur have sunk in. It should be a jarring and horrific scene.

CAPTAIN DEMO
ARGHHHHHHHHHH

CAPTION: “...they’re my problem.”


*Editor’s Note – Plesiosaur fossils have been found in Texas. Researchin’ Rosenthal.

Aquaman- The Great Untitled Adventure- Will Turner

Note: I make no apology for basing this on the Batman Brave And The Bold Aquaman. He kind of reminds me of Will Ferrell, which is why I like him. So don't say you weren't warned!

FRAME 1- Aquaman stands in the classic superhero pose, with a whale above him.
Caption: Greetings friends, I am Aquaman, lord of Atlantis and defender of the seas.

FRAME 2- Aquaman is now stood like Sean Connery era James Bond, raised eyebrow and smug grin with mermaids draped over him.
Caption: Loved by his friends...

FRAME 3- Aquaman is poised Matrix style, wielding a trident against agents dressed in scuba gear (but also with sunglasses)
Caption: Feared by his enemies

FRAME 4- Aquaman is drinking a cocktail and wearing sunglasses.
Caption: But he also knows how to have fun!

FRAME 5- Aquaman is in the Justice League watchtower, surrounded by Batman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern and other assorted annoyed superheroes. He is drooling in a very unattractive manner.
Aquaman: I am always ready for duty!
Caption: I shall call this adventure "The Adventure Where I Learned To Adjust My Sleeping Patterns In Space"

THE END

Aquaman - Accountability - Simon McDonald

1. Aquaman, swimming at maximum speed, heading down, into the depths of the ocean, unadulterated fear playing across his face. The water is dark; murky, unnaturally so - and chunks of debris are drifting with the currents. 

CAPTION

(BATMAN)

- - Superman averted a global catastrophe yesterday when he demolished asteroid 2010 XF14 from colliding with Earth.

2. Cut to the JLA Watchtower - FLASHBACK (consider alternate color palette). Batman is standing, speaking in front of Superman, Flash, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, and Aquaman - who looks rather disinterested, stifling a yawn.

BATMAN

On a related note, NASA has detected over a sixteen NEO's* within nine lunar distances or less over the last last twelve months - but the misses are getting nearer. These aren't armageddon-level threats, but it's worth noting that an asteroid of just 140 meters could deliver an impact energy of 300 megatons of TNT; more than enough to wipe out a major city.

*EDITORS NOTE: NEO = NEAR-EARTH OBJECT

3. Batman's still talking, but Aquaman has risen from his seat. 

BATMAN

We've no idea what's caused the surge in NEO's, but Superman and Green Lantern have agreed to monitor the situation carefully, and will be our prime defense against - -

SUPERMAN 

Arthur? 

The meeting hasn't been adjourned.

4. On Aquaman; he's not looking antagonistic, but there's a sternness to his expression.

AQUAMAN

I have a kingdom to oversee. That is my primary concern.

You look after the skies, Superman. I'll manage the waters.

That's always been the strength of the league, after all.

We each have our specific roles to play - - 

5. Cut back to the present - Aquaman's stopped swimming, he's just floating, looking down at something we can't yet see, in a state of shock, horrified at the sight.

CAPTION

(AQUAMAN)

- - and as long as we do so, we'll keep the world and all of its inhabitants safe.

6. Tight on Aquaman; he's angry, snarling.

AQUAMAN

Traitors.

This page would be followed by a double-page-spread of Atlantis in ruins; the consequence of an NEO.

Why Aquaman?

Created by Paul Norris and Mort Weisinger, Aquaman debuted in More Fun Comics #73 - and boy have a lot of people had fun with him. He's been mocked and ridiculed throughout all facets of pop culture; because of the supposed 'uselessness' of his powers? Because of his 'lame' costume? I'm not entirely sure why. All I know is, he's an easy target; for example, my initial script idea involved a splash page of Aquaman predicting the Netherlands to win the World Cup - contradicting 'Paul the psychic Octopus' prediction of a Spanish win (if you don't know what I'm referring to, Google it). 

I still chuckle when I envision that page, Aquaman face-palming himself because he's contradicted Paul; but I decided not to go ahead with it, simply because mocking Aquaman is easy. Everybody does it. What nobody's done, however - for me, anyway - is scribe an Aquaman tale I've actually had an interest in reading. The only Aquaman I've ever enjoyed were his appearances in Grant Morrison's JLA; I've tried reading his solo series, picked up the available trades - but nothing's ever held my interest. That's why I selected Aquaman as this week's character. I want to love Aquaman. He's a DC character; he's a member of the Justice League! (Or at least he was - who knows what the current roster of that team is...) 

The character has so much potential - he's the king of Atlantis! And I don't care what you say about his powers, I wouldn't say no to telepathic abilities combined with superhuman strength and durability. I believe Arthur Curry - aka Aquaman - can be so much more than he is. He can be an A-lister. He just needs a writer to come up with a brilliant idea for him.

Perhaps that writer will be posting his or her one page script during the week.

Or if not - if the writer goes for a humorous take - at least we're gonna chuckle!

Aquaman is a character owned by DC Comics.

Spider-Man - Dying Wish - Simon McDonald

Note to artist: I've kept panel descriptions fairly brief for this script; it's fundamentally a 'talking-heads' scene, and thus I feel you're better off making the decisions regarding the types of shots used. Same goes for the number of panels on the page; I've set this up as I see it in my head, but I'm sure you'll be able to pull it off more effectively. Go nuts. 

1. NEW YORK CITY; an alleyway, trash on the ground, walls tainted with tags of various gangs. Spider-Man is hanging upside down on a strand of webbing. Beside him is a woman, mid-twenties, clad in an outfit that hugs were shapely figure. Despite the high-heels and short short, there is somehow an aura of class about her.

JANET FOSWELL

I want you to kill my husband.

2. On Spider-Man; his mask-lenses widen appropriately, shocked by her words.

SPIDER-MAN

Huh.

3. Pull back; Janet's speaking, no emotion playing across her face - unlike Spider-Man, who can't hide his discomfort.

JANET FOSWELL

He's a very old, very sick man.

He has a heart condition.

It wouldn't be difficult.

SPIDER-MAN

Yeah.

Because that's the key issue, here.

The difficulty.

4. On Janet; still stone-faced, serious.

JANET FOSWELL

It's what he wants.

He wants to die.

SPIDER-MAN

Your husband wants me to murder him?

5. Janet has taken offense to that; and Spidey's hopped off his webline.

JANET FOSWELL

Such a cruel lexicon.

He's dying. His time is almost up.

We both feel it would be best if the process was...

Hastened. 

For both our sakes.

SPIDER-MAN

And naturally I'm the one you came to.

Yeah, sure there's Wolverine with his ten foot claws.

Yeah, there's Moon Knight, the creepy dude with the juxtaposed costume, comes out at night dressed all in white.
And there's the Punisher - you know, psycho dude who kills people for a living?

But no. 

You came to me.

6. Tight on Spider-Man.

SPIDER-MAN

You're expecting me to do - what, exactly?

Web him to death?

Poison his drink with web fluid?

Crack a few puns, hope he asphyxiates from laughter?

7. On Janet again.

JANET FOSWELL

Once you see him, I don't think that will be a problem.
He's quite certain you'll be more than willing to end his life - considering the grief he's given you in the past.

You see, Spider-Man , my husband's name is Frederick Foswell.
Perhaps you'll remember him best as the Big Man.

That's why he wants you to do it.

He thinks it'll be poetic. Cyclic.

This is his dying wish, Spider-Man.

You can't refuse.

Waitasecond!

Wasn't Frederick Foswell killed years ago saving J. Jonah Jameson's life?!

All will be revealed NEXT ISSUE!

Spiderman- What If? Will Turner

Pg 1

Spiderman has four arms and eight legs. He has a painful expression on his face as half his arms are gripping the other half.

Spiderman: Ow! Cramp! Cramp!

Text: What if...Spiderman was a bit more literal?

Pg 2

Spiderman is wearing a tie and a bowler hat. He is patiently waiting behind a white van in the middle of stereotypical London traffic.

Text: What if...Spiderman was British?

Pg 3

Spiderman shakes his fist as Mr Fantastic's arm stretches around to grab a cup of sugar.

Text: What if Mr Fantastic was Spiderman's neighbour?

Pg 4

Stan Lee looks petrified as he sees Spiderman on his roof, contract and pen in hand.

Text: What if...he was real...and he wanted his cut?

Spider-Man -Tribute - Matt Duarte

The Tenacious Spider-Man in “Tribute” by Matt Duarte

This page is to be set in six different panels. The first three are one third of the page, small and next to each other. The fourth one is a big wide one, one third of a page. The last two are at the bottom, of equal size.

Panel 1

Mephisto is standing in the middle of an empty road, somewhere in the middle of the desert. His red outfit and skin stick out sorely against the night sky and darkened road. He is pointing directly at the reader.

MEPHISTO: Play the best song in the world...

MEPHISTO: Or I’ll eat your soul!

Panel 2

Spider-Man is standing in the same empty road, he is wearing his outfit, though his mask is pulled back a bit so we can see his mouth. He is awkwardly holding a custom Fender Stratocaster guitar, with a drawing of his logo/face on it.

SPIDER-MAN: OK, but I’ve never been a music kind of person, you know?

MAN (a character off-panel): Don’t worry Spidey, we’ll help you!

Panel 3

Shot from behind Spider-Man’s back, and in front of him stands Mephisto. Spider-Man is looking back, at the person that just spoke, though we still can’t see who it is, but who has his hand on one of Spider-Man’s shoulder, as if reassuring him.

SPIDER-MAN: Be you angels?

MAN (off-panel): Nay, we are but men.

Panel 4

Spider-Man stands next to two other men. One of them has mid length brown hair, and a full beard, he is wearing jeans and a plaid shirt open, underneath there is a huge beer belly. He is dramatically singing. The other person is also a fat man, with a plain white tee shirt and jeans, balding, though with a friendly Buddha like face. He is intensely focused in playing an acoustic guitar he is holding. Spider-Man is also playing the guitar he was previously holding. Coming from all of them, there is a huge Kirby crackle of energy, shooting directly at Mephisto, who is holding up his arms, attempting to shield himself.

SFX (in big, colorful font): ROCK!

Panel 5

Peter Parker is sitting in an uncomfortably looking bench inside a Laundromat. He has just woken up from an impromptu nap and he looks slightly confused. Behind him, in one of the washing machines, there’s some familiar red and blue clothes. Up on the wall there’s some speakers where music is playing.

PETER PARKER (CAPTION): Wha... just a dream? That felt very real. Except for the part where I was playing guitar.

SFX (music): This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no. This is just a tribute.

PETER PARKER (CAPTION): Ugh, I need to find a laundry place that plays better music.

Panel 6

Shot from outside the Laundromat, though we can still see Peter through one of the windows. The Laundromat has a neon red sign with the name “One More Laundry Day”.

PETER PARKER (CAPTION): Or maybe someone to help me with the laundry. Yeah, that sounds better.

The End.

Spider-Man - Spin Me A Line - Rol Hirst

Panel One.

Spidey is battling Sandman on a beach. He leaps over him and kicks him right in the face, smashing sand everywhere.

SPIDEY: HEY, MARKO, I JUST KICKED FACE IN YOUR SAND!

CAP (Spidey): With great power comes great responsibility, that’s the lesson I learned from my Uncle Ben…

Panel Two.

Aunt May is waiting in her kitchen with her husband Jay and a big home-cooked meal… staring out the window, wondering when her nephew will arrive.

AUNT MAY: WHERE IS THAT BOY NOW?

Panel Three.

Spidey is battling the Kingpin. Kingpin has an enormous hand round Spidey’s throat and is pummelling him into the wall.

SPIDEY: OH, AND BY THE WAY - YES, WILSON, YOUR BUTT DOES LOOK BIG IN THAT!

CAP (Spidey): The one thing Uncle Ben never did tell me though…

Panel Four.

At Peter Parker’s apartment, his flatmate Michelle Gonzalez is up a ladder painting the ceiling. She’s in a bad mood because she’s having to do it by herself.

MICHELLE: ANOTHER BROKEN PROMISE, PETE – YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS…

Panel Five.

Spidey is battling Doc Ock, wrapped up in his tentacles.

SPIDEY: THAT'S IT, OCKY, I CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON YOU FOR A BIG MANLY HUG!

CAP (Spidey): …was how to choose between all my different responsibilities.

Panel Six.

J Jonah Jameson sits behind his mayor’s desk, looking furious. It doesn’t really matter what he’s screaming about – he’s JJJ, that’s just what he does.

JJJ: PARKER!!!

Panel Seven.

Spidey swings up in Mysterio’s face, pointing right into his goldfish bowl head.

SPIDEY: OOH, WAIT, MYSTERIO - NEW JOB OPP – GALACTUS NEEDS A ROLL-ON DEODORANT! YOU'RE A SURE THING!

CAP (Spidey): So – who am I gonna have to let down today? Aunt May, Michelle, Jonah…


Panel Eight.

A comedy writer sits in his office, surrounded by stacks of scripts, notepads, reference books, a computer, toys, and all the usual writer’s junk. He’s scribbling a new idea in his notebook. Behind him on the wall are a number of photos of the writer with famous comedians or TV hosts – Jerry Seinfeld, David Letterman, Larry David, Bill Cosby, Woody Allen… plus one with the writer and Spidey together. Scattered on the floor all around him are screwed up balls of paper - rejected joke ideas.

CAP (Spidey): …or that guy I hired to write me some fresh material…

WRITER: “ELECT…RO?” WHO’S THIS ‘RO’ GUY AND WHY WOULD I WANT HIM RUNNING MY COUNTRY…?

WRITER: NO, THAT’S TERRIBLE. HOW ABOUT… HEY, LIZARD, YOUR MOMMA EATS FLIES!

WRITER: PAGING NORMAN OSBORN – THE CORNFIELDS OF IOWA WANT THEIR HAIRCUT BACK...

Spider-Man - Best Served Cold - James McNeill

Not much to say about this one! I imagine a teammate or close friend (or perhaps Aunt May!) has been subject to slander or some other kind of non-violent attack. Spidey, frustrated by his inability to do much to help it, takes out his frustration how he can.

Best Served Cold

1. Night shot. Spidey swings across a darkened street.

CAPTION:

Usually this isn't my kind of stunt.

2. Spidey, with his free hand, shoots webbing against the wall of a darkened house. He's hanging from the roof.

CAPTION:

But these are special circumstances.

3. Montage/action shot: Spidey laying down webbing in vague resemblance of an actual spider's web, all across the wall. This should take a third of the page.

CAPTION:

So for once I say to hell with maturity.

CAPTION:

Intentionally.

CAPTION:

It takes me the better part of the night, but it's worth it.

4. The wall, web complete, Spidey swinging away or hanging at the end. Light from a passing car reflects off of the still-wet webbing. In the style of Charlotte's Web, it reads: "SOME PIG".

CAPTION:

No one messes with my family.

Spider-Man - Responsibility and Power - Ben Rosenthal

The following is set out in the ‘classic’ 3 line grid. The first three panels of the script are all of the same size and are on the first line of the grid. Panel 4 takes up the whole of the second line of the grid. Panels 5 – 7 are all of the same size and take up the last remaining line of the grid.

Ideally, each panel would be illustrated by a different artist.

The following does not take place in current Spider-Man continuity, but could have if things had happened a little differently.

1. A recreation of the classic panel from Amazing Fantasy #15 of Peter with his mask off, hand to his head and tears streaming down his face as he realises that he could have stopped the bank robber and saved Uncle Ben (Click here for reference).

CAPTION: “With great power comes great responsibility.”

CAPTION: “I’ve lived by this mantra for almost half of my life.”

2. Spider-Man is swinging away from an explosion, an unknown elderly lady in his arm. He has just saved her from whatever has caused the explosion. A Golden Age look here would be great.

CAPTION: “With the powers I have, it’s my duty to help those who need it.”

3. Spider-Man is down. He is not in his traditional costume, but the black symbiote duds. He is on his back; painfully sprawled on the rubble of a building which has collapsed during whatever fight he has obviously just lost. His costume is in tatters. We see a majority of Peter Parker’s bruised face behind what is left of his mask. The mask itself appears to be falling off his face, not ripped or shredded, as this panel takes place when he was still wearing the symbiote. This should reflect that the symbiote has also been knocked out.

CAPTION: “Truth is, I always knew that one day that power would not be enough, and I would fall.”

4. A classic shot of Spider-Man fighting against the original Sinister Six – Kraven the Hunter, The Vulture, Electro, Mysterio, Sandman and Doctor Octopus. Go wild here (although the cover to Amazing Spider-Man Annual #6 would be a great way to start!).

CAPTION: “Then you came along and changed all that. Now, no matter how hard it gets...”

5. Spider-Man is on his knees, wanting to collapse but not allowing himself to. One hand is supporting his weight, while the other is at his head, trying to shake off the beating he has just received. In the foreground is the Green Goblin on his glider, laughing manically. This should look as if it takes place in the modern day.

CAPTION: “...Or how much I want to just give in, I won’t because I know you’re waiting for me.”

6. Spider-Man is fighting back against the Goblin, punching him with the last ounce of strength that he has. The Goblin is being knocked off his glider by the force of the blow. It is a triumphant shot.

CAPTION: “So while with great power comes great responsibility...”

7. A nice panel of Peter in his everyday clothes sitting on the floor of his home. He has one arm in a sling and a bandage wrapped around his forehead. In front of him is a pile of building blocks that a young child may play with. On the opposite side of those blocks, and with some blocks in her hands, is a 9 month old May Parker. Peter is looking down at his daughter adoringly, with a smile on his face. It is a smile filled with love, pride and contentment.

CAPTION: “...With a great responsibility comes great power.”


Not to sound like a sap (but I will), I am dedicating this to my daughter Parker, who was my inspiration for this script.

Spider-Man - Team Up - Ryan K Lindsay

 

1. Spider-Man is sitting on the window ledge of a room and looking in, we can see from his posture that he’s kind of been busted and he’s trying to be still and quiet. Luke Cage is standing with his baby in one arm and a hushing finger held up to his lips.

Caption: A problem shared is a problem halved, isn’t that what they say?
Caption: It takes two to tango.
Caption: Two’s company, all that jazz.

2. Spider-Man is in a mirrored pose on the window ledge of the Nelson, Murdock, & Blake law agency. His shoulders are slumped as Foggy Nelson has an unsure look on his face and is shrugging because he doesn’t know where his good friend is either.

Caption: Everything is better when there’s two, Prince Adam and Cringer, pizza and beer, Han and Chewie, peanut butter and chocolate, Scorsese and De Niro.

3. Spidey is looking up into the eyes of Beta Ray Bill, Skuttlebutt looms in the background and there’s a shackled alien on the ground with some blood dripping from what might be its nose.

Caption: I guess, sometimes you just don’t know how to ask or even explain yourself so you stay quiet.
Caption: It would just be awkward for everybody; me, him, whoever we went up against.

4. Spidey is running away from the Punisher’s back. Punisher is busy shooting some goons in the back of the head as they run away from his front. This could either be really gory or just for laughs, however you play a goon getting shot in the back of the head for laughs…

Caption: And sometimes you realise that it’s best to never ask because the person might just say yes.

5. Spidey is perched on a bedside stand in a simple room; Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, has her bedside lamp on as she sits in bed.

Black Widow: You thought it would be a good idea to come to me for a team up?
Spider-Man: I just don’t really want to go through tonight alone.

6. The same panel as before but now Spidey looks just that bit sadder, he’s on the other side of the bedside stand, sitting, leaning against it, and his head is down. Natasha is reaching a hand across for him to pat him on the shoulder and has a look like she’s just caught her father crying in the tool shed.

Natasha: I don’t know what you’ve heard, but, uh, you’re not going to try and make a move on me are you?
Spider-Man: I’m just so lonely.
Natasha: Yikes…I don’t think we should even touch.

What's got Spidey so sad, dear reader? Well, you'll have to turn the page to find out. He's in a dilly of a pickle and I don't even think a night with the Black Widow is going to cure what ails him.

Why Spider-Man?

He needs no introduction. He is arguably the world’s most popular superhero. He’s certainly easier for the average reader or movie-goer to identify with than the lone survivor of an alien race or the grim millionaire vigilante. He is the everyman superhero with feet of clay. He makes mistakes, he lets people down, he catches the flu and breaks his arm and loses his temper… and there’s nobody more unlucky in love.

And yet, he never stops trying. When life gives him lemons, Peter Parker makes the sweetest lemonade you’ll ever taste. He never forgets the fundamental lesson his Uncle Ben taught him, that with great power comes great responsibility. Spider-Man is an inspiration to us all…

I certainly hope he’ll provide plenty of inspiration to my fellow thoughtballooners this week.

Blonde Phantom - Multiple Alibis - Matt Duarte

The Blonde Phantom in "Multiple Alibis" by Matt Duarte

This page is to be laid out in six different panels. The first one is a wide panel across the page, the following three are small ones in the same row, the fifth one is of the same size as the first one, and last one is a big wide one, roughly one third of the page. The caption by The Blonde Phantom should look like handwriting, as it is a journal entry.

Panel 1

Description: The Blonde Phantom is standing atop a roof of a building. We can only see the bottom part of her striking red dress, which makes a sharp contrast against the dark night, and one of her fashionable high heels which is resting in the ledge of the buildiing. From where she is standing we can see a lone man wearing a trenchcoat walking into an abandoned warehouse.

CAPTION: The Blonde Phantom's Journal, December 12th, 1942

CAPTION: Here's a question that I never thought I would ask myself. What's more suspicious, a man with no alibi, or one with multiple ones? How can one man have been in four different places at once?

Panel 2

Description: The Blonde Phantom is standing in front of a croupier holding a photo (that we can't see), inside a casino. The croupier is looking sternly at it. We can only see Blonde Phantom's back, she is wearing her red dress.

CROUPIER: Yes, he was here last night. Cleaned the house, too. I remember that ridiculous green shirt he was wearing, not many people dressed like that around these parts.

Panel 3

Description: The Blonde Phantom is standing in front of a movie theater employee, outside of a theater. She is still holding the same photo, in the same position as the previous panel.

EMPLOYEE: I remember him from last night, he had a nice trench coat. We had to kick him out of the theater, because he was ruining how Casablanca ends to the rest of the patrons.

Panel 4

Description: The Blonde Phantom is standing in front of a police officer, in front of a empty jail. Again, she is still holding the same photo, still in the same position.

POLICE OFFICER: He was wondering around drunk last night. We picked him up and let him sleep it off. Sorry Phantom, we let him go this morning.

Panel 5

Description: The Blonde Phantom is now right outside the door of the place she was watching earlier. She is holding her gun and about to kick the door in.

CAPTION: And to top it all off, last night, one of my informants saw him go in an dead end alley with another person, but only he came out. Good thing he was able to snap a photo of him as he was coming out of the alley that helped me track him down.

Panel 6

Description: We see the Blonde Phantom, having just come across the door. She is holding her gun, and shouting. Before her, stand several dupes and the original James Madrox, The Multiple Man who is in front of all the dupes. They are all holding up their arms, but their expressions are all different. They are all wearing their trademark green shirts and long trenchcoats.

CAPTION:I don't know what this creep's deal is, but something strange is going on, and it is my duty as the Blonde Phantom to investigate.

BLONDE PHANTOM (big font, screaming): Hands up in the air, creep!

BLONDE PHANTOM (smaller font): What the...

DUPE 1: It's a raid! Every dupe for himself!

DUPE 2: Ooh, I like her dress!

DUPE 3: Man, they really knew how to make femme fatales in this time period.

DUPE 4: Please, the domino mask is sooo Golden Age.

JAMIE MADROX: Quiet, all of you! Maybe she can help us get back to the future. Hi, I'm Jamie Madrox, the Multiple Man.

Next: Crisis on Infinite Noirs!