Note to artist: I've kept panel descriptions fairly brief for this script; it's fundamentally a 'talking-heads' scene, and thus I feel you're better off making the decisions regarding the types of shots used. Same goes for the number of panels on the page; I've set this up as I see it in my head, but I'm sure you'll be able to pull it off more effectively. Go nuts.
1. NEW YORK CITY; an alleyway, trash on the ground, walls tainted with tags of various gangs. Spider-Man is hanging upside down on a strand of webbing. Beside him is a woman, mid-twenties, clad in an outfit that hugs were shapely figure. Despite the high-heels and short short, there is somehow an aura of class about her.
JANET FOSWELL
I want you to kill my husband.
2. On Spider-Man; his mask-lenses widen appropriately, shocked by her words.
SPIDER-MAN
Huh.
3. Pull back; Janet's speaking, no emotion playing across her face - unlike Spider-Man, who can't hide his discomfort.
JANET FOSWELL
He's a very old, very sick man.
He has a heart condition.
It wouldn't be difficult.
SPIDER-MAN
Yeah.
Because that's the key issue, here.
The difficulty.
4. On Janet; still stone-faced, serious.
JANET FOSWELL
It's what he wants.
He wants to die.
SPIDER-MAN
Your husband wants me to murder him?
5. Janet has taken offense to that; and Spidey's hopped off his webline.
JANET FOSWELL
Such a cruel lexicon.
He's dying. His time is almost up.
We both feel it would be best if the process was...
Hastened.
For both our sakes.
SPIDER-MAN
And naturally I'm the one you came to.
Yeah, sure there's Wolverine with his ten foot claws.
Yeah, there's Moon Knight, the creepy dude with the juxtaposed costume, comes out at night dressed all in white.
And there's the Punisher - you know, psycho dude who kills people for a living?
And there's the Punisher - you know, psycho dude who kills people for a living?
But no.
You came to me.
6. Tight on Spider-Man.
SPIDER-MAN
You're expecting me to do - what, exactly?
Web him to death?
Poison his drink with web fluid?
Crack a few puns, hope he asphyxiates from laughter?
7. On Janet again.
JANET FOSWELL
Once you see him, I don't think that will be a problem.
He's quite certain you'll be more than willing to end his life - considering the grief he's given you in the past.
He's quite certain you'll be more than willing to end his life - considering the grief he's given you in the past.
You see, Spider-Man , my husband's name is Frederick Foswell.
Perhaps you'll remember him best as the Big Man.
Perhaps you'll remember him best as the Big Man.
That's why he wants you to do it.
He thinks it'll be poetic. Cyclic.
This is his dying wish, Spider-Man.
You can't refuse.
Waitasecond!
Wasn't Frederick Foswell killed years ago saving J. Jonah Jameson's life?!
All will be revealed NEXT ISSUE!
I'm always wary of people "doing noir" but this is "noir done well". Very atmospheric, but with the classic Spidey humour puncturing it as well. A neat balance not easily achieved.
ReplyDeleteNice Simon. Spidey sounds like Spidey - something that isn't always as easy as it seems.
ReplyDeleteGreat work.
Well, you had me at Foswell, Simon - intrigued enough to want to know where this was going even without the final caption. Little bit of proofreading / tidying up needed here (I should by now have established myself as a stickler for such things - sorry!) but overall a well-scripted page.
ReplyDeleteI don't know this Foswell character so probably the impact is a bit lost in me, but great noir stuff Simon. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteCheers guys!
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I was just reading some reprints of Amazing Spider-Man and Foswell appeared in #50-something, so I figured I'd use him. If he's made appearances since then, this script won't hold up at all, haha!
Damn fine blend of Spidey in a straight noir page. I think his one-liners crack but I still see her straight face as he says them. Great stuff man, just great stuff.
ReplyDelete