Rick Grimes in "Family Man" by Matt Duarte
This page is to be laid out in four panels, all of them in the same size, wide and short, across the page.
Description: Seen from the back seat of a police car. Rick and his friend Shane are sitting in the driver and in the passenger's seat respectively. They both have their heads turned toasted each other, and they are talking.
RICK: When I came home last night, I found the little guy crying. I had to ask Lori what was wrong with him, 'cause he wouldn't talk to me. She said he was mad at me.
SHANE: How so?
Description: Same as before, only this time Rick is raising his hands in frustration.
RICK: Apparently it's "Bring Your Parent to School" day or some other deal like that. Her mother tried to explain to him that I couldn't make it with my scheduled patrols, and he was having none of it!
SHANE: Alright, I see where you're going with this. That thing at the school, it’s today?
Description: Same as before, except now Rick has calmed down and Shane has his hand on his shoulder.
RICK: Yeah, later today...
SHANE: Well, don't you worry about a thing, Rick. Uncle Shane will cover your ass with the guys at HQ, and you can take the afternoon off to spend it with your boy.
RICK: Really? You would? Thanks, man.
RADIO SPEAKER: Attention all officers in the surrounding area...
Description: Both Rick and Shane have stood up on their seats, getting ready to answer the call.
RICK: Shit, sounds important.
SHANE: Don't worry, we'll take care of this quickly. Wouldn't want to disappoint little Carl, now would we?
RADIO SPEAKER: Possibly armed suspect, heading eastbound on US 62...
I like this scene better than the one they had on the TV show. That one just seemed really... uncomfortable.ReplyDelete
Matt - you are getting really good at dancing in between the raindrops of continuity - I like it. This script works simply and easily. It's a great little flashback type of page. Well in.ReplyDelete
Ah - a minus 1 story! Perfectly executed, Matt. I haven't seen the show yet, but as Danial points out this would be an excellent opener.ReplyDelete
Woops, I thought I had replied to this already.ReplyDelete
But yeah, the inspiration for this came from the show. I really dig that they are developing the relationship between Rick and Shane more than they did in the comic, but that opening scene could have been written a lot better, in my humble opinion. This is just my sad attempt at fixing it, ha.