Sunday, July 24, 2011

Captain America – The Onward Dirge – Ryan K Lindsay

Page 1 - 4 Panels

1. Captain America looks out to see atop a large ship. They're out on a cold and dark sea at day, in the background on the ship we can see a few jet fighters, those Tanks used on D-Day, and some Rotabuggies. Cap's got the mask off, the shield on as a backpack (because I always loved that feature), and he’s thinking. The sky is grey, the tone is muted, battle is not far away. Bucky is behind Cap, and off panel, and he’s speaking to Cap. This panel should be wide across the top.
Bucky: It’s not as crazy as it feels.


2. Cap laughs without turning around.
Cap: It feels like I’ll never get used to change.
Cap: My body, these weapons…the enemy. World’s growing at an exponential rate.
Bucky: That’s not a good thing?
Cap: For every good an equal evil will mirror.


3. Cap turns around, Bucky stands firm, he believes in this mission.
Bucky: Then we’ll always have to be better.
Cap: We’re riding a giant ice bullet.
Bucky: It’s just a ship, Cap. Pykecrete isn’t magic, it’s science.
Cap: Feels like a mistake.

4. Cap looks back out over the ocea, we have panned back to see the two men atop a ship made of a strange translucent material (the aforementioned Pykecrete) and in the distance is a Norwegian island with a HYDRA base on it. Have fun making it all look awesome!
Cap:
Cap: If war is hell then why am I so damn cold.
Bucky: I don’t know, Cap.


This page was so much fun to write. A bit of research went into it and that was fun, too. We’re stuck with WWII Cap and I didn’t want to write a whole “Hey, look, a moment in Cap’s war history we didn’t know about is about to be told and it hasn’t been referenced before but it’s really important and now we’re going to introduce it and make it pay off soon.” I didn’t want to write that, but how do you write a WWII Cap story without kind of touching on that? I’m not going to rewrite something we already know, but I didn’t want to suddenly introduce Iron Fist into the mix. Though, Orson Randall would have been awesome. Hey, hang on…no, wait, Randall fought in WWI – everybody calm down.

Anyway, I set out to write a character page. I also wanted a cool setting and hopefully I’ve nailed both. The concept of the Pykecrete boat is pretty much true, check this link http://strangeweaponoftheweek.com/tag/wwii-weird-ship, but I obviously thought the Marvel U would take an operation like that and make it work. I tried to shoe horn the idea that this ship was like a bullet to pierce the heart of a Norwegian HYDRA! base but then I realised it just wasn't information for this page. I would never fit it in the page sensibly, and I'd definitely put it in later for the issue, so I had to think about what the rules are here, what the purpose is, and I did something for the best for this page, not for my idea. Overall, I hope you enjoyed it.

Don’t forget to leave a rating :)

8 comments:

  1. Nice use of Cap and Bucky. I also like that you brought to my attention an obscure historical fact. Thanks :)

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  2. I love Bucky when he's written well. You have written both Cap and Bucky extremely well. The only thing I would change is finishing it on Cap's last line - it's a lot more powerful.

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  3. I agree with Ben, think I'd lose Bucky's last line. But that aside, the dialogue between the two rings true, you've really nailed their voices. Awesome stuff, Ryan. Same as usual, right?

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  4. I like Bucky's last line, but I'm certainly not married to it. A cool silence could just as easily greet Steve's last line.

    Thanks for the feedback guys.

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  5. Nice concept and well executed. I'll get on board the "Bucky's last line isn't needed" train. A great opener for a character I'm really excited seeing everyone's pages for this week.

    It hooks into the central concept of the character nicely too.

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  6. Great research, great imagery, this is pure Lee & Kirby WWII Cap goodness. Or Steranko. Steranko would have had a field day with that giant iceberg boat.

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  7. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I'd also vote for removing Bucky's last line. Sometimes less can be a lot more, and I think this is one of those cases.

    Apart from that, great page. Really good character work on Cap, Bucky, and Cap and Bucky. If this is the calm before the storm, I can't imagine what awaits them on that island.

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  8. I guess I'm going to be in the minority here, but I didn't like the dialog. It feels like Bucky is the "older brother" here, which doesn't feel right at all with their relationship. Sorry Ryan, but this one just fell flat on me.

    Other than that, I like the idea and research that went into it.

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