PAGE ONE (three panels)
PANEL ONE, HALF-PAGE SPLASH
A man stands on the edge of a lookout. Before him lies the ruin of a large city. Most of the city is rubble and the buildings that are still standing have large sections missing. A giant bipedal creature, the size of the tallest visible skyscraper, is ambling between them. It is green, bat-winged, and has a face full of tentacles--Cthulhu.
CAPTION: This is what has become of the world--reduced to nothing more than RUBBLE and DUST.
CAPTION: It has been this way now for over a year…
CAPTION: Ever since that ABOMINATION and its ARMY revealed themselves from beneath the waves to wage war on humanity.
As of the man’s POV, we see a close-up of Cthulhu carelessly brushing past a building, its wall collapsing.
CAPTION: I call it a WAR…
CAPTION: However--truth be said--it was more like a MASSACRE.
CAPTION: For the most part, the attack was unexpected, unprovoked, and particularly brutal.
Close on the man’s face, looking saddened.
CAPTION: There were some who were forewarned of this APOCALYPSE, however--
CAPTION: --A select few who were SENSITIVE ENOUGH to hear the creature’s calls through their DREAMS.
CAPTION: I probably wouldn’t have believed it possible...
CAPTION: … if I hadn’t been one of them.
This page actually began life as the beginning of a screenplay. Depending on how good his memory is, Ryan might even remember it as I posted on Twitter a few years back ;)
And as an added bonus, I've actually sketched up the page (with captions):
|Click to enlarge.|
A nice, clean (looking) page with some strong visuals.ReplyDelete
It'd be cool to see what an artist could come up with for that opening panel.
Danial - I certainly do remember. I like this page, it works instantly to draw us in. Nice stuff, indeed.ReplyDelete
Damn that opening half splash could be an amazing visual, such a great way to hook in the reader. The captions are suitably moody and bleak, totally capturing the hopelessness of the situation.ReplyDelete
That final line adds just the right amount of mystery to make me interested in the human character when so easily the huge monster god could take focus. Great page.
Danial - you won me over with the layout sketch. Particularly the expression on the man's face in the final panel. Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words. Oh dear - we're all out of a job.ReplyDelete
The dialogue had a nice sense of foreboding and despair, though I did feel it could have flowed better in the final caption of panel 1. "Revealed themselves" might have been better replaced by "emerged" or similar.
Great work Danial. I love seeing your layout sketches, as I know that you draw them roughly before you write. Curse you and your talents which I desire.ReplyDelete
The man had a great voice to him, and I could hear the despair in his voice.
This is one rather tight page. It shows that you put some good time and effort into it. The layout sketch only further demonstrates the strength of it all.ReplyDelete