Thursday, March 8, 2012

Nick Fury- The Man At The Top -Dan Hill

Page 1 (6 panels)

1.1
We OPEN on a CLOSE UP of a newspaper, laid out on some-one's knees. The paper is the Défense de la France. The headline exclaims:

“SUPER SOLDAT!”

Beneath the headline is a CLOSE UP black and white shot of CAPTAIN AMERICA beaming proudly.

FURY (OFF): Whaddya’ think?

1.2
AGENT REED RICHARDS of the OSS looks up from the newspaper, smiling. He’s leaning back in a simple wooden chair by the side of a small, single bed. He’s younger than we’re used to seeing-- no grey in the temples. He wears a pair of green khakis, combat boots and a dark woolen pea coat.

We’re inside a small, cramped bedroom somewhere on the upper floor of an old house.

RICHARDS: Skinny kid turned super soldier? I love it.

RICHARDS: Something on your mind, Nicholas?

1.3
Large panel. CUT TO SGT. NICK FURY looking out of the bedroom window a few yards from RICHARDS. He’s wearing combat fatigues. Young. No eye patch.

FURY: World’s gettin’ stranger, Richards.

FURY: Human torches, men from under the sea.

1.4
Fury slides the window up slightly.

FURY: Four colour heroes got everyone thinkin’ the world’s black and white.

1.5
CLOSE UP on Fury who now has a rifle in his hands. It’s pointing out of the open window. He looks through the scope.

His free eye is closed.

FURY: Thing is...

1.6
Large panel. EXTREME CLOSE UP on Fury’s finger, about to pull the trigger.

FURY: We both know that ain’t the case.

6 comments:

  1. I'm really not sure what to think, considering that I'm kind of lost about what, exactly, is going on. Especially considering that you've got Reed Richards in the page. Does this have something to do with Hickman's SHIELD series?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, maybe not my best page.

    Essentially the page is about how Fury is the one who has to make the 'tough choices' whilst the public facing heroes get to play heroes and villains. Fury on the other hand operates with shades of grey.

    In original continuity Reed Richards was an agent of the OSS during WW2. Obviously with the sliding timescale this is probably no longer the case. I liked the idea of including Reed as he was someone then who would begin in the shades of grey like Fury and later move into being just another '4 colour hero'.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Overall mate I didn't love the page the last few panels totally lost me, however I did really like the opening two panels. The newspaper is a great storytelling device and can convey a lot without it seeming ham fisted and forced on the reader, and you handled it really well. Panel 2 also held some strong Reed Richards dialogue.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Gotta echo Mk and Shaun here - I was a little lost reading it. This day in age, having Reed in WWII totally takes me out of the universe.

    ReplyDelete
  5. As someone who grew up with Reed and Ben being contemporaries of Fury in WWII, I don't really have a problem with this. It did feel more like an alternate reality remix and there were lots of interesting questions in the set up, just not many answers.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I actually really enjoyed this page. It might not work with current-continuity anymore, but I don't see that as a big deal. It really is a smaller part of a bigger whole, but the situation and the dialogue is enough to hook my interest.

    ReplyDelete

Feedback is what every good writer wants and needs, so please provide it in the white box below
-OR-
If you want to play along at home, feel free to put your scripts under the Why? post for the week.