Tuesday, July 3, 2012

The Lizard - ExperiMENTAL - Grant McLaughlin

Okay, this is a silly one, but once I got the basic idea in my head, I couldn't think of anything else.  To be read in an old timey radio voice.

1 - This isn't so much a panel as it is a caption box that takes up the top portion of the page.  Not a ton of space, just enough to fit in all them words.  The rest of the page would be evenly divided between the four actual panels.

CAPTION: The Lizard is easily one of Spider-Man's most fearsome foes!  But what if Dr. Curtis Connors' experimental serum been based not on lizards but on some other creature with the awesome powers of regeneration?!  Read on, dear reader, for a tale that will surely shock you to your very core!

TITLE CAPTION: What If Dr. Connors Had Experimented With...?

2 - A generic laboratory.  There's a lab station where you see a whole bunch of sciency goodness (beakers, bunsen burners, and so forth).  Curt Connors has been transformed into a giant, human-sized sea cucumber, which if you'll excuse my juvenile brain, looks might similar to a certain part of the male anatomy (that link is to a sea cucumber, not the male anatomy).  Anyways, the sea cucumber monster would be censored (likely blurred out?) to protect those with weak constitutions.  Important note: the sea cucumber is definitely wearing a white lab coat.

CAPTION: Sea cucumbers!

DR. CONNORS: I don't think this is appropriate for a kids' book...

3 - The same laboratory, except this time Dr. Connors has transformed into SpongeBob SquarePants (along with white lab coat, of course).  Connors / SpongeBob wears a look of concern at he looks at himself.

CAPTION: Sponges!

DR. CONNORS: Closer, but I feel like this might not fly with Nickelodeon.

4 - The same laboratory, except this time Dr. Connors has transformed into Patrick Star (also of SpongeBob fame) (also with a white lab coat).  Donnors / Patrick is getting frustrated, which consists mostly of angry eyebrows and crossed arms.

CAPTION: Star fish!

DR. CONNORS: Not better.

5 - The same laboratory, except this time Dr. Connors has transformed into Spider-Man (i.e. but with a white lab coat).  Connors / Spider-Man is face palming.  The real Spider-Man is leaning in from the panel border and is yelling at Dr. Connors.

CAPTION: Spiders!

DR. CONNORS (muttering): Forget it...

SPIDER-MAN: Hey!  Get your own shtick!


  1. I can't say I expected much in terms of light hearted humor this week, so consider me pleasantly surprised in you making it happen and work while doing so.

  2. Completely off the wall, but I loved it.

  3. Anyone else see this in the old Romita Sr./Buscema style? And the next page a full-page ad for Hostess Fruit Pies?

  4. @R.A. - I think that comment's funnier than my actual script.


Feedback is what every good writer wants and needs, so please provide it in the white box below
If you want to play along at home, feel free to put your scripts under the Why? post for the week.