Saturday, October 20, 2012

Top Cow Talent Hunt - Raymond Wonsowski


ok...fully aware this is breaking the rules a little bit...but the pieces all came together way late last night, especially this spread, and I really want to know if I'm on the right track...especially Tom Judge's voice, I'm not sure if I got him right...let me know...Note: page one has the embassy exploding, and this takes place roughly a year after...

PAGE 2 & 3

(double-page spread)

The left half of page 2 should be three panels, one on top of the other. Lower right hand corner of page 3 should be a small panel by itself. The rest is a giant splash.

Left Panel 1 – Checkpoint barricade. On our side, two Marines in full armor flak and rifles slung. One pushes his helmet back a little to get a better look at the Passport and FBI ID flashed by the man on the other side of the barricade, TOM JUDGE (dressed as usual: black suit, a robin's-egg blue shirt with his priest's collar undone). The other Marine is calling in on his radio. Note: No buildings, no trees, no background scene, only the light violet-grey sky.

CAPTION 1 – Most embassy incidents, whether criminal or terrorist, are usually handled by the State Department in-house by the Diplomatic Security Service.

CAPTION 2 – After Nine-Eleven, though, DSS started sharing the investigative workload. Incidents on embassy grounds get passed along to the FBI.


Left Panel 2 – TOM, now past the barricade, is walking (towards us), hands in his pants pockets. The bottom, and some of the foreground should be a faint purple-ish smoke, but the very bottom is pure white.

CAPTION 3 – Reading the initial redacted reports, I wondered why fly me down here. Scans like a terrorist attack, or local insurgents like the E.P.P. Except...

CAPTION 4 – Paraguay's a rinky-dink third world nation bullied by it's South American neighbors. And the “People's Army” can barely afford machetes. This kind of destruction's beyond them.



Left Panel 3 – TOM gets on one knee looking over the edge of the smoky white at the bottom of the page. He runs a single finger along the white.

CAPTION 5 – Then I saw the uncensored version, and why they sent their favorite "Father Spooky Mulder".

CAPTION 6 – Across the street was a National Police precinct house and a hospital.  The other side of the avenue had a politician's campaign headquarters. Presidential residence and a bank further down the road.

Splash – Aerial view, Asuncion, the vicinity of the Embassy, except (if you assume the Embassy was ground zero) there is now a white bowl about 3 kilometers wide, smoky violet dust rising from the center. Outside the bowl, trees, houses, and office buildings are toppled outwards away from the bowl on all sides. Note: Nothing is burning, so the destruction should be evident. In the distance, a military helicopter hovers above the scene.

CAPTION 7 – Traffic cops, newspaper stands, fruit sellers, windshield squeegiers.  Everyone and everything was obliterated in the blast. 

CAPTION 8 – No fire, no heat. But lots of light and noise. And the sheer force of the event.

CAPTION 9 – And one other detail...

Lower Right Corner Panel – Close-up, TOM sucks on the finger he ran along the edge of the “bowl”, his nose scrunches at the taste.

CAPTION 10 – Yup.

CAPTION 11 – Salt.



6 comments:

  1. Excellent conspiracy mystery build-up. Sets the scene with the small details before showing us the bigger picture, as it were.

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  2. terrific set up, and way to establish a fun and almost topical mystery with all the details! Great narration to wonderfully visual script

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  3. Damn thats a good two page splash.

    Visually stunning use of imagery, which would hold such impact across the two pages.The captions feel meaty and tonally pretty dead on in my books, you add a lot of information and character in those boxes but it's always a good balance, never seeming forced or over worked.

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  4. This is a great page with some awesome imagery at play. The knowledge and 'local colour' really shine through on this page too.

    The page also builds nicely with a great pay off visually and caption-wise.

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  5. This is a wicked page, Ray. Your choice of imagery is rock solid, and the captions you bust out do a great job of setting the scene. As Dan points out, your knowledge of the area really adds a lot to the page as a whole. Lots of intrigue here and I'd love to read what comes next.

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  6. Thanks for all your comments everybody! Proposals AHOY!

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