Saturday, December 29, 2012

Rudolph the Red Lantern - R.A. Wonsowski

Splash page -

Foreground, RUDOLPH, surrounded by a red aura, spewing blood from his mouth and suited in black, a red domino mask about his eyes, and his glowing nose bearing the sigil of the Red Lanterns:
 
He is flying toward us, screaming his own version of the Red Lantern oath (below)

Background: On a snowy, starry night, high above the world, Green Lantern GUY GARDNER has used his ring to rescue SANTA CLAUS, and another energy beam has caught his sleigh and its giant, overflowing bag of toys sticking out the back.  SANTA is relieved, but worried, as his other reindeer are nowhere in sight.  GUY with a fiercely determined look on his face, has also manifested an emerald-energy cookbook titled "101 Holiday Recipes for Venison" and barbecue tools.

SANTA:  No, Guy!  Don't!  You just made the NICE list this year!

GUY:  Sorry, Mr. Claus, but there's no other way!

RUDOLPH:  Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen!
                      Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen!



            Together by my hellish hate,
            I'll burn you all--That is your fate!


CAPTION:  They laughed at him.  They called him names.  They wouldn't let him play any reindeer games...

CAPTION:  Now, they're going to pay...

TITLE:  Green Lantern in:  Rudolph's ChristMASSACRE!!!
SUBTITLE:  (or, Won't You Guide My SLAY Tonight?)

3 comments:

  1. Darkly hilarious concept. And it feels just right that Guy Gardner is involved.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is an insane yet oddly wonderful concept. This page has so much to love. Rudolph as a bad guy, his version of the oath is golden, the tools Guy decided to create for this battle are comedy gold.

    Great,fun one pager man. Good stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The title makes this page. It's goofy as hell but it gives the page a kind of Silver Age feel.

    ReplyDelete

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