Friday, March 29, 2013

Kingpin - Old Man Murdock - J.D. Coughlan


SET-UP: Set in the future, à la Old Man Logan, where Matt Murdock has retired as Daredevil due to the fact that his super-senses are fading and he's becoming an ordinary old blind man. One day he receives a message from Kingpin asking for help.

Panel 1: Close on Wilson Fisk. Only his head and shoulders should be visible here, but he is not as large as he once was, albeit still stocky. His face is lined with age, but still dignified. He sits in a wheelchair. Behind him, silhouetted in the doorway, is Matt.

FISK: Is that you, Matt? I knew you'd come.

Panel 2: On Matt, making his way into the room. He is dressed in casual clothes and dark glasses, and also carries a white cane. He has grey hair now and, like Fisk, a lined face which is currently serious.

MATT: What do you want, Wilson? We haven't spoken in years; not since that "truce."

Panel 3: Fisk has turned to face Matt.

FISK: I hear you're losing your powers.

MATT: Get to the point. We're not getting any younger.

Panel 4: Close on Fisk again, very grim, looking up at Matt.

FISK: Do you know what happens to men like me when we get old?

FISK: People start to lose the fear and respect they had for you... They see the man underneath the myth...

Panel 5: Close on Matt. He tries to remain stoic, but clearly Fisk's words hit home with him too.

FISK (O.P.): They start to wonder how to get rid of him, how to replace him.

FISK (O.P.): Old enemies come out of the shadows, and old allies turn into new enemies.

Panel 6: Close on Fisk. He gives a small, sad grin.

FISK: You see, I'm losing my powers too, Matt.

END OF PAGE

5 comments:

  1. Nice little piece of poignant parallelism. I'd be interested to see where this all goes.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice mirroring going on here and the interplay and dialogue is strong too.

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  3. I love the old man Logan setting and your tale of Old men missing the good old days hits the perfect sweet spot that this set up allows for.

    Your dialogue is wonderful and the character work is natural and fitting.

    Mighty fine page.

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  4. I really liked this. I think everyone loves these alt future stories... you have all the power/weight of the iconic characters and existing dynamics along with the gap in expectation/understanding of what has happened in between.

    Some thoughts: [ that you might completely disagree with :) ]


    I think that

    FISK: Is that you, Matt? I knew you'd come.

    would be more assertive as

    FISK: I knew you'd come.


    Also, if

    FISK: I hear you're losing your powers.

    was something like

    FISK: I heard about your situation.

    then

    FISK: You see, I'm losing my powers too, Matt.

    can act as a reveal and establishing the parallel.


    Great work though, really enjoyed it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! Your points are very true, but as to the first one: I just wanted to establish that they call each other by first name now. Just an added little touch, heh.

      Delete

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