Sunday, March 3, 2013

Krypto - His Master's Voice - J.D. Coughlan

Panel 1: Jor-El and Lara's home on Krypton. Jor-El sits at his computer console, turning to face Lara and rolling his eyes. If possible, the screen of his computer should read "POTENTIAL SEISMIC INSTABILITY". Lara carries a box with a little white puppy, Krypto, poking out, wagging his tail.

JOR-EL: For Rao's sake, Lara...

LARA: I couldn't just leave him in the bio-sci labs, Jor-El. You know what happens to those animals.

LARA: Don't worry; I'll take complete care of him. You won't have to do anything.

Panel 2: Jor-El pacing around their living room, gesturing angrily. Krypto, now a bit bigger, sits up on the couch, watching him in the classic HMV pose. Jor-El is looking at Krypto, as if he can understand.

JOR-EL: Can you believe it?! They refused my proposal again!

JOR-EL: It's almost like they don't want to know whether this planet -- the one we live on -- is safe or not!

Panel 3: Jor-El sits at his console, which displays a familiar, small spaceship. Krypto sits next to him and Jor-El rubs behind the dog's ears. Krypto is now full-size.

JOR-EL: Don't worry, friend, you'll be safe. Better off than staying here, anyway.

JOR-EL: And, if it works for you...

Panel 4: Jor-El and Krypto asleep on the couch together. Behind them, Lara stands, hands on hips, but smiling wide.




  1. I like what you're aiming for, but the entirety of the script feels like it's stretched thin.

    1. I feel ya. It does feel a little off from what I had in my head.

  2. I think MK has a point. The script could be strengthened somewhat with maybe reworking the dialogue in panel 3 and maybe changing some of the poses and descriptions in the final panel.

  3. I really enjoyed this page J.D. Seeing the interplay between Jor-El and Krypto and the changing relationship they have feels honest and real, which is a hard thing to pull off when you are dealing with super aliens. haha.

    Plus that final panel is just oozing with emotion and meaning.


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