Friday, October 18, 2013

Arkham Asylum: The Hunter's House - Niel Jacoby

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Panel 1: Batman stands at the gates of Arkham, futzing with the locks. Nightwing is with him, watching his back in case someone tries something.

Batman: I SWEAR, THE NEXT TIME SOME SHENANIGANS GO DOWN AT ARKHAM ON HALLOWEEN, I WON'T EVEN RESPOND. IF THESE IDIOTS CAN'T RECOGNIZE A SIMPLE PATTERN, THEY'RE THE ONES WHO SHOULD BE IN THE PADDED CELLS.

Nightwing: HELL, BRUCE, I DIDN'T KNOW TRICK OR TREATING WITH DAMIEN MEANT SO MUCH TO YOU. SUCH A DEVOTED FATHER.

Batman: DICK, YOU MAKE ONE MORE CRACK AND I-
(LINK)
WE'RE IN.

Panel 2: POV from the door of Arkham. Batman and Nightwing are running through the path up to the main door of the gothic mansion-turned-asylum as turret robots in goofy halloween costumes rise up from the lawn.

SFX: vvvvvvvvRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Batman: HURRY, NIGHTWING, WE MAY GET INSIDE BEFORE THEY START FIRING!

Nightwing: ON IT, BATS!

Panel 3: POV from behind Nightwing and Batman as they enter the asylum, and see that it has been turned into a hall of mirrors.

PA: AH, BATMAN, GOOD TO SEE YOU BROUGHT SOME MORE GAME FOR THE HUNT!

Batman: YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY WITH THIS, JOKER!

PA: NO.

Batman: RIDDLER?

PA: NO.

Batman: UH... THE GUY. THE GUY WITH THE TRAPS AND THE... PURPLE?

PA: IT'S DEADSHOT! THE ONE WITH THE SCOPE EYE?

Batman: AH.

PA: ANYWAY, THE ONLY WAY YOU'LL BE ABLE T-

Batman: -TO RESCUE THE  STAFF AND INMATES IS TO BEST THE MANY TWISTS AND TRICKS OF MY HAUNTED NOT-SO-FUN-HOUSE.

Panel 4: We see Batman solemnly standing by the doors where he was in panel 3 as Nightwing smirks at him.

PA: ...

Batman: YOU REALLY ARE THAT PREDICTABLE.

Nightwing: AND YOU'RE A BIG OL' HALLOWEEN HUMBUG.

Batman: SHUT UP.

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