Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Rhino – Rhino Saves the Marvel Universe – MK Stangeland Jr.
Monday, April 28, 2014
Rhino - Handle With Care - Grant McLaughlin
Four rows of panels. Panel 1 and 8 are their own rows (one and four), extending slightly further to the left and right than rows two and three (which are made up of panels 2-4 and 5-7, respectively).
1 - Rhino stands on the street, looking wistfully into a storefront window. From the framing, we can't see what the store is or what's within that window. All we have to go on is the longing of Rhino's body language - he places a hand on the window, as if he could reach whatever it is that holds his attention.
RHINO (1): *sigh*
RHINO (2): One day.
2 - Rhino stands, surprised and sheepish, holding a blinged-out car door that he has just ripped off of its frame while trying to open it. Overdrive looks out from the driver window in surprise and frustration.
OVERDRIVE: My getaway car!
RHINO (quietly): Sorry.
3 - Close-up of a deck of cards on a card table. The deck is all ripped, rumpled, and wrecked - it's completely unusable. In the background, it's clear from the colourful costumes that supervillains have gotten together to play a hand or two.
OFF-PANEL: So it's agreed: Rhino never shuffles again.
4 - Rhino sits at a desk, his bulky frame far larger than the tiny surface before him. The desk and the ground around it is littered with broken pencils. If you can manage it, Rhino can be in the midst of breaking yet another one while trying to write with it. His shoulders slump in defeat.
RHINO: They've got to make these out of something stronger than wood...
5 - Rhino and Electro's faces look towards each other, framing the foreground of the panel. Electro looks towards Rhino angerly; Rhino looks back in embarassment. In the background between their faces it is clear they are in an elevator. Particularly, we see the elevator controls (all the numbered buttons), which have an enormous finger indentation in them, which has clearly destroyed the panel (it can spark electricity if you'd like).
RHINO: It was like that when I got here.
6 - Rhino stands in a mixture of shock and agitation. Before him, Shocker is doubled over, holding his arm, which is clearly in a ton of pain.
SHOCKER: That's what you call a high five?!
7 - Doc Ock is having Rhino over for tea (don't question this, just roll with it). Doc Ock holds a fine china teacup, a delicate teapot, milk, and sugar - one in each of his tentacles. He gestures proudly to a reinforced monster of a mug that is placed in front of Rhino. It is huge, metalic, and surprisingly scary-looking for a drinking vessel. Rhino once again slumps his shoulders sadly, a fact that Doc Ock seems to overlook in his pride.
DOC OCK: I think this should do perfectly well after what happened last time.
8 - Back to that first scene. We've changed perspective, as we're now looking into that storefront Rhino was staring wistfully into. Through the glass we can now see the object of his desire: a "Build Your Own Boat in a Bottle!" set that sits happily in the display case (with a picture of a boat in a bottle, possibly a child and father looking on happily, etc). While this should be the focus of the panel, Rhino's face should be visible in the "reflection" - we can see that he is one sad panda (possibly shedding a tear).
RHINO: One day...
Rhino - Redemption Road, Revisited - R.A. Wonsowski
Been a long time since I walked down Redemption Road, so....
For those of you who don't know, one of by burgeoning notebooks is filled with notes called Redemption Road. The nut of it is that Max "Electro" Dillon goes straight when he finds out he has an infant daughter, Tess. To support her, he becomes a skip-tracer, a kind of bounty hunter for supervillains who jump bail or go fugitive from trial. He discovers that in both roles as good guy and father, he doesn't suck at either job...
One of my ideas for "Season 2" is that as Max's business begins to grow, he enlists some unusual help to balance his workload. And occasionally needs a...specialized...babysitter.
Layout:
123
444
444
Panel 1: MAX at his open closet door, shrugging on a jacket made out of one of his old costumes, green with yellow lightning stripes down the front. The closet is crammed with clothes, an umbrella stroller and a folded up playpen, stuffed toys peppering throughout, including a cuddly looking Hulk toy.
MAX - ...instant Cream-o-Wheat on the counter, if she gets fussy. And don't let her near the computer...
RHINO (off panel) - Max, I can handle it!
Panel 2: MAX at the door of his apartment, about to walk out the door, a wistful and unsure smile on his face.
MAX - I'm not saying you can't, just Tess can be a handful, y'know?
Panel 3: Continuation of Panel 2, RHINO is on the sofa bouncing two-year-old TESS on his knee. Both are smiling, and TESS is lightly sparking with electric glee.
RHINO - My friend, your daughter is an absolute joy. Look how happy. What could possibly happen?
Panel 4: Foreground, RHINO is charging scared, cradling TESS like a football, who is giggling heartily. RHINO clotheslines two SKRULLS in his mad dash. Behind them, giant gamma irradiated space slugs are chasing them through Central Park, green lasers bouncing off his hide and knocking down trees. Up in the night sky, flying saucers are illuminating the scene in yellow light. A circular inset panel in the lower right hand corner features the heads of DEADPOOL and THOR.
RHINO - EEEEEEE!!!
TITLE CARD - ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING - a Wonsowski-Lim joint
CAPTION - featuring Deadpool & Thor!
DEADPOOL - The Super-buddies!
THOR - (mildly annoyed) I say thee nay.
Rhino - The First Crack - Simon McDonald
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Rhino - Blind Date - Ben Rosenthal
1. Rhino is walking down a New York street on a wet and windy night. He wears a hooded jumper over his Rhino suit (as he cannot take it off). The hood is pulled up to try and disguise his horn. Rhino's head is down, hands in the pockets of his hoodie, trying to blend in to the crowd. Due to his size it isn't very successful, but people seem happy to ignore him.
CAPTION (Rhino)
I'm strong. I can crush a car with my hands if I want.
2. Side on. Rhino is standing out front of a movie theatre. He has a nervous smile on his face, and is waving hello to her. In front of him is a female, obviously dressed for a date. She is pleased to see him, although unsure what to think of this hulking mass in front of her in a sweat shirt.
CAPTION (Rhino)
Yeah I've been slapped around by some heavy hitters in my time..
3. Rhino is standing up straight, however the wind has caught his hood, blowing it back revealing his horn.
CAPTION (Rhino)
But this suit o'mine is bonded to my skin.
4. The woman is looking at him in horror. She knows who he is.
CAPTION (Rhino)
Throw what ever you want at me.
5. Rhino is alone in an empty apartment, lonely and sad.
CAPTION (Rhino)
I can't feel a thing.
Why The Rhino?
The Rhino came to be when thug-for-hire Aleksei Mikhailovich Sytsevich volunteered for an experiment that bonded a super strong polymer to his skin. Naturally, this polymer suit- similar to a rhinoceros's hide, and outfitted with twin horns that can penetrate steel - augmented Sytsevich's strength and speed, and turned him into one of Spider-Man's strongest villains.
And now, a character featuring in The Amazing Spider-Man 2, portrayed by Paul Giamatti.
Here's the truth: I don't recall any standout Rhino stories. I can't pinpoint any quintessential Spidey versus Rhino moments. Not to worry: lets create some in our scripts this week.
And, uh, if you want to fill me in on the best Rhino stories? That's what the comments are for!
Friday, April 25, 2014
Prophet - A Real Reign Will Come - Niel Jacoby
Prophet - Famous Last Words - R.A. Wonsowski
Set-up: One billion billion years from now, the last John Prophet oversees the last surviving sentient life on his security dreadnought warship, the solitary witness to the heat death of the universe. It is in a slow orbit around the last star shining, a pulsar whose last heartbeats are eating itself as it dies. The survivors have killed each other and themselves in a final attempt to forestall the inevitable, until only John Prophet is left. In deep sorrow, he has overloaded the great Kaiku drives of the cathedral engines, and awaits his own grand fiery death.
Layout:
111
111
234
Panel 1 - JOHN PROPHET sits in profile on his great captain's throne of technology and steel, his head barely visible from the top of his hulking war-titan armor. His hair is a white spiky mane, his Liefeld-ian braided ponytail in a giant coil at his feet, his face clean-shaven, revealing the last cruel million years of warfare and age. He is the Methuselah of the far future writ in blood, silicon, and iron, head hung in exhaustion, his gauntleted hands barely gripping the control arms of his throne. Background, an ornate triangular porthole reveals the last pulsar's entropic dying beats on a velvet sea of black, lighting the depowered bridge in a dim cast. His two-bladed cleaver-sword sticks out of the primary control panel in the foreground, no sparks, only slender wisps of smoke.
CAPTION: Surrender, John. You earned your rest, after how many lifetimes of war.
CAPTION: In the last thousand years alone, you defeated the plans of the Hierophant, taken bloody revenge on the Ho'P'Lo elders, and killed the monstrous Bendix with your hands around its throat.
CAPTION: It's over.
Panel 2 - Zoom in, JOHN's head and shoulders in profile, eyes closed, an old man in his chair. The pulsar in the window begins to fall apart like a dandelion in the wind, its core small and tenuous.
CAPTION: For you. For the universe. It's all the same.
CAPTION: Rest in peace.
Panel 3 - Zoom in, only JOHN's facial features in profile, his weakened eyes defiantly open, looking straight ahead again. The pulsar on the window is a faint spark. Double over the lines to show the dying tremors of the ship. Colors should be darker.
CAPTION: And yet...
CAPTION: ...there is still a hint of defiance in you. And if you cannot strangle all Creation yourself, you will at least give its epitaph.
Panel 4 - Zoom in, JOHN's cracked lips and teeth, barely visible in the near dark and vibration, gritting and spitting his last.
CAPTION: The last words of lonely John Prophet, lovingly hissed on his final breath, the name of his great ship...
JOHN (small lettering): FIAT LUX.
//the next two pages nothing but whiter than white as the ship explodes//
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Prophet – Stop Killing Yourself – MK Stangeland Jr.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Prophet - In Truth - Grant McLaughlin
1 - A planet floats in the darkness of space. It looks pretty desolate and empty. The lightbeam that awoke the many different Johns in issue #23 comes from off-panel, going directly to the planet.
CAPTION: The signal traveled along the vastness of space.
2 - Planetside. This is a planet of craggy mountains and rock. One of those drill capsules has emerged from the ground. John and the capsule are on the side of a tall and sheer cliff-face. John Prophet has already emerged from the capsule and is in the process of throwing up the Ampa Micakane stimulant that every John Prophet seems to expel upon awaking.
CAPTION: Reaching yet another of its many destinations
3 - John injects himself with the stimulant.
CAPTION: As always, John Prophet awoke, ready for the task ahead.
4 - Two figures crest a nearby hill, walking towards John. They are still a good distance off, but their appearance is visible. They wear colourful robes that cover most of their long and skinny bodies, with almost comically large hats that look similar to the shells of hermit crabs crowning their heads.
CAPTION: But before he could begin, Truth Wizards of Oanra came to him.
5 - John and the Truth Wizards stand in conversation. He listens as the Truth Wizards speak (in the indecipherable way that aliens speak in this series).
CAPTION: And they spoke.
6 - John Prophet looks towards the reader, a look of sadness and resignation on his face. He is defeated.
CAPTION: Their words were unwelcome.
7 - Another far shot, like in panel 2. John falls from the cliff-face, having leaped to his death after hearing what his interlocutors had to say. The Truth Wizards are walking away, having already made some good distance. The capsule and John's equipment lay on the ground, abandoned.
CAPTION: Yet undeniably true.
Sunday, April 20, 2014
Prophet - Lore - Brian Manton
1.
A John Prophet sits on a throne, surrounded by small, somewhat humanoid (but not at all human-like) aliens. He wears a crown and jewellery fashioned from alien bones.
CAP: The Pretender reigned as God for untold years.
2.
A large space ship crashes into the alien palace.
CAP: Until the Saviour smote the palace down.
3.
Inside the wreckage of the throne room, another John Prophet (dressed for space travel) emerges from a hatch in the space ship. The Pretender stands from his throne, furious.
CAP: And emerged the perfect likeness of he we had worshipped for so long.
4.
The Pretender raises an axe and charges the new John, but new John simply shoots him with a laser pistol.
CAP: The Pretender thought to destroy him but the Saviour revealed his divine power
5.
New John carrying out repairs to his space ship. Aliens gather around him in awe but he pays them no attention.
CAP: He adorned his skyhammer with trophies from our lands.
CAP: When it began to growl again we knew the Saviour would return to the heavens.
6.
A small swarm of the aliens sexually pleasure John in the way only a swarm of small aliens can.
CAP: Not interested in worship, we feared he would leave us.
CAP: But the shemales reached out to the divine within him and he looked favourably upon us.
7.
Inside a starship. A huge window reveals a space-scape in the background.
An adult alien sits with a group of alien children, telling the story of their ascent to the heavens.
Alien: We have lived amongst the stars of the Gods from that day.
Why Prophet?
![]() |
Giannis Milonogiannis |
![]() |
Simon Roy |
Set ten thousand years in the future, there are countless clones of John Prophet throughout space, allowing for infinite variations of sci fi stories to be told with the character.
![]() |
Farel Dalrymple |
With such wide scope, there is room for much more than sci fi stories, with Graham noting one of the main aims of the series was to "out 'Conan' the current run of 'Conan'"
![]() |
Simon Roy |
The series seems to be greatly influenced by the European scifi found in Metal Hurlant by Moebius and Phillipe Druillet.
![]() |
Moebius |
![]() |
Phillipe Druillet |
Prophet features an amazing lineup of talented artists including: Brandon Graham, Simon Roy, Giannis Milonogiannis, Farel Dalrymple, James Stokoe and even 2000AD's Dave Taylor.
![]() |
James Stokoe |
Space has no boundaries and there are innumerous John Prophets to be discovered. Stay tuned to Thought-Balloons this week to meet a few of them.
![]() |
Simon Roy |
Saturday, April 19, 2014
Headspace - Resonance - Brian Manton
1.
Shot from behind Max, as he stands on the main street of Carpenter Cove, the town stretching out before him.
Max centre frame, the panel is split vertically showing the headspace version of Carpenter Cove on the left and IRL Carpenter Cove on the right.
Headspace Cove is in night and the strange creatures that populate it crawl the buildings.
IRL Cove is daytime, a busy town with happy people.
Max: They built a town in my head.
Max: I've come to the real town... for some perspective I guess.
2.
IRL Carpenter Cove.
Low shot looking up at Max. His feet are rooted on the ground but from his waist, multiple versions of his torso spring out, flailing in different directions.
Max: Everything vibrates into place and I hear something click.
3.
Headspace Carpenters Cove.
The dark town is empty.
Max: My mind is a ghost town.
4.
IRL Carpenter Cove.
A car crashes into a shopfront. Everyone who was walking around the town has fallen to the ground asleep. The sleepers look distressed.
Max stands in the middle of all of this, dumbfounded.
Max: And everyone out here has one of my personal demons to wrestle with in their dreams.
Headspace - The Recess - R.A. Wonsowski
Layout: 2x3
Panel 1 - Through the mouth of the crevasse, we see the Cove across the lake at a very dim twilight.
CAPTION: I take one last look back before I go into the recess. Night falls like a kiss from a creepy uncle.
Panel 2 - Dark gray rock walls, going up and on into the dark forever, no end to the depth.
CAPTION: Last time with the flashlight was disorienting. Spots danced and played hell on my eyes whenever I swung it around.
Panel 3 - Black.
CAPTION: This time I'll let my night eyes adjust. Go in blind. In my head, I sing like Mama used to when the power'd go out.
Panel 4 - Black.
CAPTION: Amazing grace, how sweet the sound...that saved a wretch like me...
Panel 5 - Black.
CAPTION: I once was lost...
CAPTION: ...god...
CAPTION: ...but now....
Panel 6: Black, except for the impossible gleam of a knife edge.
CAPTION (someone else): ...i see...
Congratulations RKL and Mr Hill on your success! And thanks again for letting me play in your sandboxes...
Friday, April 18, 2014
Headspace - The Whole World - Niel Jacoby
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Headspace – Thinking Outside the Box – MK Stangeland Jr.
Monday, April 14, 2014
Headspace - Adrift - Grant McLaughlin
One more thing, the first three panels would be in Eric Zawadzki's inimitable style, while the remainder of the page would be Riley Rossmo's. The reason, if not already, will become evident as you read through.
1 - We open on Linda, the character from the first three pages of the first issue, in the boat Shane sent her off into the ocean in, sitting in the same position - arms handcuffed behind her back and looking down into the rowboat's bottom. She is afloat in the middle of the water - pretty similar to that third page. It is just starting to rain, with a few scant raindrops harmlessly falling from the heavens.
CAPTION (LINDA): Carpenter Cove was always quiet.
2 - The camera can start to move closer to Linda and her boat, although it's still pretty far off. The rain increases in intensity - it's becoming a regular shower.
CAPTION (LINDA): But nothing lasts forever.
3 - We're closer in yet again. The rain has developed into a true downpour, slapping against Linda, her boat, and the water. The ocean starts to become wild and choppy.
CAPTION (LINDA): I know it was only the calm before the storm.
This would be where the lightning gutter comes into play - perhaps a red lightning bolt - taking us across the page and into the art change.
4 - Closer still, water is coming over the side of the boat. Linda pays it no mind.
CAPTION (LINDA): So I got out.
5 - The rain continues, but Linda's boat, while filling with water, has landed on a beach.
CAPTION (LINDA): It wasn't pretty, but it worked.
6 - Pull out, Linda continues to ignore the world around her in the background, but our focus is on Morley Mack (of Green Wake fame, natch) who is standing on the beach and smoking a cigarette.
CAPTION (LINDA): Unfortunately, I have a feeling I only traded one storm for another.
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Headspace - Spinoff! - Ben Rosenthal
NOTE: This will only make 'sense' if you have read HEADSPACE #2. I use the term 'sense' very loosely. Apologies to Ryan, Dan and the rest of the HEADSPCE crew.
1. A text panel running across the top of the page. The title is a graphic resembling the Indiana Jones logo.
TEXT: From the mind of Ryan Lindsay comes the next break out character from the hit comic HEADSPACE - THE ADVENTURES OF SURPRISE ALLIGATOR!
2. Max is inside his house, answering the front door. His hand is on the doorknob as he is about to open it.
SFX: Ding dong.
MAX: Ah, that must be my copy of "Murderer's Illustrated"
3. The door is open. Surprise Alligator Has leapt on top of Max, jaws singing in to his midsection. Max has lost a hand.
4. Max is in bed, on his side getting ready to kiss his wife. She is next to him in bed, covered up by the quilt. It appears she is already asleep. Max is puckering up to kiss her goodnight.
MAX: What a day! Goodnight honey.
5. Surprise Alligator is in Max's bed, not his wife. He is eating Max's face. Surprise Alligator is wearing sexy lingerie.
6. Max is answering the door again, similar to Panel 2 however it is a new day and he is dressed differently. He is being cautious about opening the door - there is fear in his eyes.
SFX: Ding dong.
MAX: Uh...
7. The door is open with Max putting his hands up as he believes he is about to be attacked by Surprise Alligator. However a postman is in the doorway holding out a box.
POSTMAN: Delivery for you, sir.
8. Max is taking the box from the man, looking at it in disbelief.
MAX: Uh, thanks.
9. Surprise Alligator is springing out of the small box, defying the laws of physics and eating Max's head.
Why Headspace?
Then last year a pitch of his was picked up by Monkey Brain comics. That pitch was HEADSPACE. The basic outline of this is:
The inhabitants of Carpenter Cove discover their strange town is actually a construct in the mind of a killer. Shane, the sheriff, wants to get back to his real life but one dark connection between him and the killer is going to make him rethink everything.For a series that has the ability to mess with reality (and does so) it remains firmly grounded. It messes with your mind as well as following its own linear path of storytelling. And it is captivating stuff.
Oh - and I did forget to mention that another former Thought Balloon writer, Dan Hill is the editor of HEADSPACE AND writes the back up matter each issue.
For that reason we are celebrating HEADSPACE this week at Thought Balloons. Not only is it an excellent book, but it shows that if you work hard enough, and want it enough your dreams are attainable.
Go pick up HEADSPACE here - only 99 cents.
Friday, April 11, 2014
Rat Queens - All-New Rat Queens #1 - Niel Jacoby
HANNAH: THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT. WE HAVE TO ROLL NEW CHARACTERS, JUST BECAUSE DEE COULDN'T KEEP FROM PULLING A DUMB LEVER?
KURTIS: HEY, SHE SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT IT THROUGH. NOT LIKE THE DUNGEON WOULDN'T HAVE BOOBY TRAPS.
CAPTION: A SUDDEN TUMBLE--AND FRIENDSHIPS MAY BE DASHED AT THE BOTTOM! WHAT LIES IN STORE FOR THE ALL-NEW RAT QUEENS WHEN ROCKS FALL, AND EVERYONE DIES?
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Rat Queens – The Maze – MK Stangeland Jr.
Monday, April 7, 2014
Rat Queens - Ugh - Grant McLaughlin
HANNAH: Ugh, dungeon crawling is the worst.
BETTY: I didn't think anything would be less fun than that one we went through last week, but here we are.
2 - Focus on Violet as she tries to knock some of the dark water out of her ears.
VIOLET: How can you guys be down on this? We made out with a fuckton of swag from that dungeon, and I hear this one has even sweeter loot.
3 - The Queens' attempt to clean up are interrupted by a group of animated skeletons who have shown up and are now surrounding them. The skeletons have various weapons, armour, and beat up equipment that they wield threateningly. Violet has her weapons at ready, while the rest of the Queens mostly still look annoyed, still not taking this super seriously.
DEE: Animated skeletons?
HANNAH: So lame.
VIOLET: Don't worry...
4 - Cut to a shop back in Palisade. The Queens are rather worse for wear, with some rips to their armour, cuts and bruises to their person, and the like. It also appears they haven't quite figured out how to get out the stain that dark, gross substance. That being said, they also have a wheelbarrow full of loot (statues, gems, jewlery, relics, and so forth) that looks pretty substantial. Unfortunately, they stand, dumbfounded and shocked, before a shopkeep who is telling them something they aren't overly keen on hearing.
CAPTION (VIOLET): It'll all be worth it.
VIOLET: What do mean you don't want any of this?!
SHOPKEEP (1): It's not that I don't want it, but I'm not made of gold pieces. I can't keep paying you for every single ancient artifact you happen to stumble upon!
SHOPKEEP (2): Especially considering all that junk you brought in last week!
5 - Final panel. Can be relatively small. We're outside the shop, pulled back a good distance. The Rat Queens have graffitied and scuffed it up in anger. They have turned over the wheelbarrow and used some of their loot to damage the building. Their counterblow struck, they trudge away bitterly.
HANNAH (small text to impress our distance from the characters): Well that totally sucked.
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Rat Queens – Pirate Booty – Shaun Richens.
Why Rat Queens?
Saturday, April 5, 2014
The Falcon - High Flight - Brian Manton
1.
Sam Wilson with his friend Sammy St. Clair, both about 10 years old. They are at Sam's pigeon coop. Sam holds a pigeon in his hands. Sammy looks fascinated.
CAP: Boy I knew in Harlem, Sam too - Sammy St. Clair, the only person I've met more obsessed with flying than me.
2.
Sammy's dad, in military uniform, kneeling in front of him saying goodbye. Sammy smiles, his eyes wide with pride.
CAP: His dad was a pilot in Nam. Died there in the end.
3.
Sammy, older, in a similar uniform to his dad. He is shaking hands with Sam Wilson before he ships out.
CAP: Didn't put Sammy off though. Signed up himself in time.
4.
Full page bleed. (Panels 1-3 inset)
Bright blue sky mottled with whispy white clouds.
Small in the panel, Falcon ascends in an upward arc.
CAP: He told me this poem. An aviators favourite, his dad had told him.
CAP:
Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long delirious, burning blue,
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew -
And, while with silent lifting mind I've trod
The high untresspassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand and touched the face of God.
Text Box:
High Flight
Pilot Officer Gillespie Magee
No 412 squadron, RCAF
Killed 11 December 1941
The Falcon - Now THAT's Gangsta! - R.A. Wonsowski
Layout:
1111
2233
4444
5555
Panel 1 - Four "gangstas" are standing in an alley, going through their small paper bags full of cash. For the sake of simplicity (and the script), they are, from left to right: TOOFY, a bulky black thug about 20ish, pointing to the ill-gotten cash with his semi-automatic pistol, sporting a doo-rag, wife-beater t-shirt, MC Hammer pants, and a grill full of gold-plated teeth; HOODY, a shaved-head white guy nearing 30 that looks like he has quite a habit, wearing a hoody and baggy jeans slung mid-thigh, revealing Spider-Man boxers, and holding one of the paper sacks of cash; CAPPY, an young Asian teen wearing baggy clothes and a New York Mets baseball cap with the brim pulled to the side and tilted down, holding the other cash sack; and ESSE, a near-30 Hispanic gangster sporting a bandana around his head, bowling shirt open, and skin tight jeans, the only one aware of his surroundings, pointing at a rootop off-panel, a look of fearful surprise on his face.
HOODY: This serious paper, yo!
TOOFY: That's GANGsta, now, bee-yotch!
ESSE: YoyoyoyoyoyoYO! Eyes up, homes --
Panel 2 - Standing on a tenement roof ledge, arms akimbo and chin heroically jutted, is the FALCON (in his classic 70's red and white costume, looking down on the urban foursome.
ESSE: (off-panel, from below) -- the m@%#er-#&$%¡ng FALCON!!!
HOODY: (off-panel, from below) Cap his @$$!!
Panel 3 - On the left is ESSE, TOOFY is on the right. TOOFY fires his pistol held sideways, but the shot has gone wild, as a circular inset panel reveals why: "slide-bite", which is when the slide of the semi-automatic pistol "bites" the webbing of the hand between thumb and forefinger when you hold it like a dumbass like this. Because of this poor handling of the weapon, the shell casing has ejected from the gun upwards and right into ESSE's eye.
ESSE: Aagk!
TOOFY: Yowch!
Panel 4 - Background, FALCON plants his feet into the chests of TOOFY and ESSE as he lands, the gun falling from TOOFY's hand. Foreground, CAPPY turns to run but has slammed face-first right into a lamppost that was previously obscured by the lowered sideways brim of his cap. HOODY runs as well, but has tripped over his low-slung pants, about to faceplant into the sidewalk. Both of their bags of cash are flying everywhere as they crash.
SoundFX (ESSE and the lamppost): KLONG!
HOODY: ShaaAA!!
Panel 5 - Two uniformed COPS, looking a lot like Ernie Hudson and Dan Akroyd, pile the four "gangstas" into a paddywagon, all bruised and embarrassed. The FALCON grins and watches as he leans against the lamppost on the left side of the panel, pointing nonchalantly at the foursome.
FALCON: Now THAT's gangsta!
OFFICER HUDSON: If by "gangsta", you mean "dumber'n stumps"...
OFFICER AKROYD: Five-oh in your hiz-zay, yo's...
Friday, April 4, 2014
The Falcon - Flyin' High In The Friendly Sky - Niel Jacoby
HYDRA 1: ALRIGHT, I'LL DELIVER THE PLANS TO MAX FROM THE ASTORIA CELL, AND IT SHOULD ALL GO ACCORDING TO PLAN.
HYDRA 2: GOOD TO KNOW. SAME TIME NEXT WEEK?
HYDRA 1: YOU KNOW IT.
Panel 2: We see Sam "Falcon" Wilson in the SHIELD helicarrier's drone control bay, listening intently. There are a few other crewmen in the shot. Wilson is smirking.
RADIO: -KNOW IT.
WILSON: LOOKS LIKE WE'VE GOT ALL WE NEED. REQUESTING APPROVAL OF EXPLOSIVE STRIKE.
CREWMAN: HEH, NOT LIKE YOU NEED IT.
WILSON: FIRING.
Panel 3: we see the apartment building from P1 as it explodes from the inside.
SFX: FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!
Panel 4: Sam Wilson takes off his headphones as one of the crewmen is about to throw him a beer from a cooler under one of the tables.
Sam: THAT'S ANOTHER HYDRA PLOT TAKEN CARE OF. WHAT IS THAT, 3 THIS MONTH?
Crewman: HAT TRICK!
Panel 5: Sam catches the beer as the rest of the room lifts theirs in celebration. A crewman of noticably lower rank looks apprehensive.
All: TO THE FALCON!
Younger Crewman: HEY, WEREN'T THERE PEOPLE IN THERE?
Panel 6: Wilson shrugs, beer in hand.
Wilson: COLLATERAL DAMAGE.
Crewman(OP): HEY WILSON, COMMANDER FURY WANTS TO SEE YOU!
Thursday, April 3, 2014
The Falcon - You Can't Take the Sky from Me - J.D. Coughlan
Falcon has been kidnapped by the Red Skull and is being tortured and experimented on.
Panel 1: Torture room. Sam lies strapped to a table, beaten and bloody. Red Skull stands over him, sleeves rolled up. Two HYDRA guards stand at the door. Sam has a weak grin, which annoys the Skull.
SAM: (small, wobbly) Hehehe...
SKULL: You may well laugh, Wilson, perhaps smug in the assurance of a rescue. Know this: By the time Rogers even learns of your disappearance, there will be very little of you left to save -- mentally, if not physically.
Panel 2: Close up on Sam. He lifts his head slightly off the table, wincing from the pain.
SAM: (wobbly) There... There will always be something left, Skull... Something you... can't take...
Panel 3: Close on the Skull. He turns from Sam, now with a smug grin.
SKULL: Please... I was a Nazi, remember? I know how hollow such poetic sentiments are in reality.
SKULL: Fine for inspiring the less-educated masses, but they can be made to believe in anything. And, with enough suffering, nothing at all.
Panel 4: Large panel. Over the Skull's shoulder. His back is to Sam, facing the reader. His smug grin has dropped. Sam's head is still raised, staring intently at the Skull.
SAM: Look at history... There has never been a completely successful dictatorship... Because... Because the more adamantly you try to get people to believe something, the more they will consider the opposite... Even if you kept all of mankind locked away underground, they'd still dream of the sky...
SAM: Freedom isn't a belief or an idea... It's not something you can cover up or disguise... It's a feeling deep in the heart of every person ever born. That's why you'll never win. Not in any way that counts.
SAM: So do your worst, Skull. I'll be dreaming of the sky.
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