Rhyno - Lights, Camera, Action! - Niel Jacoby

Panel 1: Rhino is in a locker room, psyching himself up. The benches and lockers are reinforced.

Cap(Rhino): I BEEN TRYIN' TA GO STRAIGHT FOR A WHILE NOW, BUT NOTHIN' EVER SEEMED TA STICK

Panel 2: Flashback, Rhino, in a tailored security guard outfit, the hat hanging off his horn, stands at the door of a bank.

Cap(Rhino): I TRIED SECURITY GUARDIN', BUT TURNS OUT A GIANT SCHMUCK IN A RHINO SUIT DON'T MAKE PEOPLE FEEL ALL DAT SECURE.

Panel 3: Flashback, Rhino is standing next to Arnold Schwarzenegger, who is at least a head shorter and narrower than him.

Cap(Rhino): TRIED STUNTMAN WORK, BUT THEY COULDN'T FIND ANYONE DAT I FIT IN TERMS A SIZE, IF YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

Panel 4: Flashback, Rhino is at a construction site, and the Wrecking Crew is scowling at him.

Cap(Rhino): EVEN TRIED DEMOLITION WORK, BUT TURNS OUT THERE WERE ALREADY GUYS WORKIN' DAT BEAT.

Panel 5: Rhino is standing in gorilla position in the UCWF(Unlimited Class Wrestling Federation) Arena in New York City, right about to go through the curtain. There's a heavyset guy with a ponytail sitting at a little table watching a monitor, and Rhino is talking to him.

Rhino: YOU THINK I'LL DO ALRIGHT, PAULIE?

Paulie: AH, DON' WORRY ABOUT IT, I BOOKED YOU AGAINST THE BEST GUY IN THAT LOCKER ROOM. JUST LISTEN TO HIM, AND YOU'LL HAVE THE HANG OF THIS IN NO TIME.

PA: APPROACHING THE RING AT 355 POUNDS, HAILING FROM LINCOLN NEBRASKA, THE DEMOLITION MAN!

Panel 6: Rhino is walking out to the ring, loudly arguing with children in D-Man shirts in the front row.

Cap(Rhino): I THINK I'M GONNA LIKE THIS GIG.

PA: APPROACHING THE RING AT 385 POUNDS, HAILING FROM NEW YORK CITY, RHIIIIIINOOOOOO!