Panel 1: Intro Box – An ULTRON head surrounded by three digital-style hearts are surrounded by the text.
TEXT (1): And now, Twisted Relationship Theater Presents:
TEXT (2): The Artificial Love of Ultron!
Panel 2: HANK PYM and ULTRON.
HANK PYM: I think I’ve created artificial life somehow.
ULTRON (1): I hate you, dad.
ULTRON (2): And all other humans, too.
SFX: MEMORY ERASURE!
Panel 3: ULTRON and WASP (JANET VAN DYNE).
ULTRON (1): I love you for reasons, ambiguously-related mother figure!
WASP: Never going to happen!
Panel 4: ULTRON and VISION.
ULTRON (1): Fine, then I’ll be a single dad instead and make myself a son to help wipe out humanity.
VISION: I’ve decided I like humans for reasons and that you’re evil.
ULTRON (2): Son, I am disappointed. Now I must destroy you.
Panel 5: ULTRON and JOCASTA.
ULTRON (1): I didn’t want a son anyway.
ULTRON (2): I’ll just make myself a new, better robot wife based on my ambiguously-related mother figure.
JOCASTA: I’ve decided I like humans for reasons and that you’re evil.
ULTRON (3): I am disappointed. Now I have to destroy you, robot wife/daughter/replacement mother figure!
Panel 6: ULTRON with a heart that has ‘HUMAN GENOCIDE’ written on it.
ULTRON (1): At least I’ll always have you, death of all humanity.
ULTRON (2): I know you’ll never leave me.
TEXT BOX: Next time: Tony Stark’s Love for All Women!
(And, as a bonus, have a visual version of the comic of dubious quality I decided to slap together this week!)