Panel 1: DAREDEVIL, his location exposed inside a warehouse against some nontraditional ‘ninjas’. They’re not so much ninja’s as they are gangsters, thugs, and punks who do a bad job trying to look ninjaesque and have surprisingly impressive martial arts skills.
DAREDEVIL lands on the edge of the group. He kicks one in the face as he comes down.
DAREDEVIL: (Thought Balloon) They certainly aren’t armed like ninjas.
Panel 2: Focus on a NINJA PUNK armed with a slingshot specially designed to throw ninja stars – the panel should be drawn in ‘DAREDEVIL VISION’ style, as seen in what I think was V3 of Daredevil.
DAREDEVIL (Thought Balloon) Shuriken Slingshot?
Panel 3: DAREDEVIL avoids the shot ninja star and other attacks while shooting his billyclub at a NINJA THUG armed with a katana poorly retrofitted with a conspicuous-looking power-pack and is buzzing with a motorized blade. Everything except for DAREDEVIL should be in DAREDEVIL VISION, and special emphasis should be placed on the sword.
SFX: (Sword) BZZZZZZZZZ
DAREDEVIL: (Thought Balloon) Electric Swords?
Panel 4: DAREDEVIL is crouched on the ground while kicking a FAUX NINJA. He’s looking off-panel while winding up with the billyclub he shoot in PANEL 3.
NINJA GANGSTER: (Off-Panel) DROP!
DAREDEVIL (Thought Balloon) A minigun!?
Panel 5: DAREDEVIL VISION. A NINJA GANGSTER armed with a MINIGUN gets hit in the face with one end of DAREDEVIL’s billyclub. The gun is active, but not firing any bullets at the moment.
SFX: (Minigun, trails off) zwrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
NINJA GANSTER: GUAH!
DAREDEVIL (Thought Balloon) I’ve met some ninjas in my time, and these guys are no ninjas.
You pack in some interesting and unique visuals here, along with your regular dose of excellent sfx, but I'm not completely sold on the thought balloons. In the context of the single page, they feel a little over-written, although perhaps in a larger context they would fit better.ReplyDelete