Friday, May 22, 2015

The In-Between - a proposal - Ray Wonsowski

This is one I've been mucking around with for the last couple months. Really cemented when I heard B.B. King died. It's hardboiled mystery, with a novice view of the aetherworld.


Panel 1- open mouth on a pale face. A trickle of blood runs from the bottom lip.

CAPTION, ARBOGAST: (white font on black) ...OK, imagine this...

Panel 2- zoom out, now we see the face, sort of. A bullet's exit wound is where his left eye should be. The other eye has dilated.

CAPTION, ARBOGAST:'re a detective, the kind you swore you wouldn't be. Working the "cheat beat". Messy divorces, philandering husbands, adulterous wives, you're a peeping Tom with a license...

Panel 3 - zoom out further. WIDOW is knealing on the ground, the DETECTIVE, his name is B.B. ARBOGAST, has his head in her lap, turning he blue dress black from the blood pooling around her. A small .22 lies on the ground by their side. Her face is speckled by light blood spatter. Tears run down her cheeks as blood rushes from his face. Her dress and coat should be conservative, but cheaply gotten. He's in a button down Oxford and khakis, running shoes on his feet. ARBOGAST is definitely dead.

CAPTION, ARBOGAST: ...then in walks that Case, the once-in-a-lifetime rainmaker. A government whistleblower, with two file boxes full. You're even in the mood to celebrate as you lock them up the office...

Panel 4 - zoom out further. POV from above, a beat COP rushes to the WIDOW, radio held to his lips, frantic for back up. A pair of translucent white bare feet peek in from the lower right corner.

CAPTION, ARBOGAST:  ...and you're shot in the back of the head as you walk to your car.

Now, the case that Arbogast really needs to solve is his own murder. Because his soul will not rest until he does.

A ghost, and he doesn't know the first thing about being one.

Welcome to the world In-Between.

Happy anniversary, you all are the best.

1 comment:

  1. Jumping Jehoshaphat, Ray! This script is razor sharp, with a (excuse the pun) killer opening image and stupidly tight dialogue to follow it. I cannot say enough. I want - nay, need - to know more.


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