Panel 1: Location is at a bar. POV is from the bartender. Beast is sitting at a bar and is in his contemporary look.
Bartender (off panel): What can I get ya?
Beast: I require your most immense receptacle with a gallon of water and a few pinches of crumpled Dramamine.
Bartender (off panel): ...we have three different kinds of beer?
Panel 2: POV from panel 1 with slight changes. In front of Beast is a very large bowl. He sticks his paw in the water and moves it before he drinks it. There is slight wave in the bowl and water falling off.
Bartender (off panel): What’s your damage?
Beast: The crux of Scott Summer’s revolution: Mutant Lives Matter.
Bartender (off panel): Why is a seven foot, three hundred pound cat trivializing his people’s cry for reform?
Beast: Oh my Watson and Crick. Is that a line out of Summer'sblog? This world. Our problems. They are bigger than all of us. Peace is factually unmanageable.
Panel 3: Same POV of panel 2, but with Beast face first in a very large bowl with beer splattering all over and dripping down the panel as if it was a window.
Bartender (Off Panel): Casual at the most, but I see your point. What have you actually done though? Don’t you think Scott’s radical engagements and mantra shows he has accomplished more than you since you sit here attempting to get a good buzz on?
Bartender (Off panel): Here’s a trivia fact for you: Mutants are 47.4 percent of all homicide victims and 52.5 percent of offenders. Your one-eyed buddy thinks his actions will cause a drop off.
Panel 4: View is from Beast’s POV. Reader sees the bartender for the first time and he’s Nick Fury moonlighting as a Bartender. He is pouring another drink into Beast's bowl.
Bartender: Again. What you done to make a difference?
Panel 5: Same POV as the first two panels with slight changes. Bartender is grabbing the bowl. Beast is trying to dab the fur around his mouth with a napkin and holding up his other paw.
Beast: General, do you have a phone? Also, can you dial and put it on speaker.
Panel 6: A black panel with a transcription
Transcription: Five minutes later, Beast Called Wolverine and asked for a laboratory at the Jean Grey School of Higher Learning. Two days later, the Original X-Men were misplaced in the current 616 timeline.
This is neat, a fun perspective and great play on Beast's unique vocabulary. A smart, political, very Marvelish discussion because it ties in contemporary issues. The whole Mutant Lives Matter thing is pretty, pretty, pretty good.ReplyDelete
I do think the lines of dialogue are a little full. Some of the speech balloons go over three lines of dialogue, and I've always thought a good rule of thumb is one sentence; one balloon, and that sentence shouldn't be more than two lines. Or you can go by the Mort Numbers.
I'd echo David's point on the dialogue in that I think it could be a little tighter while getting across the same point. My other question is why you chose to have Nick Fury as the bartender / devil's advocate. Is there a particular part of his personality or background that inspired the choice?ReplyDelete