Thursday, September 17, 2015

Little Nemo in Transmetropolitan - R.A. Wonsowski

Panel 1- LITTLE NEMO is shocked and cornered in bed by SPIDER JERUSALEM, grinning like a Cheshire cat with a cigarette between his teeth.

NEMO: Wh-wh-who are YOU?
SPIDER: Why, I'm your Uncle Spidey. I have all sorts of sights to see.

Panel 2- long shot of a Gothic hospital, a rainbow aura surrounding it against a grey sky. An ambulance is in front of a door, two orderlies escorting a straightjacketed figure inside. NEMO and SPIDER walk up the drive hand in hand to it in conversation.

NEMO: What is this place?
SPIDER: Welcome to the Hillary Clinton Hospital for the Politically Insane. Let's take the nickel tour...

Panel 3- In a rec room filled with drooling catatonics, a buxom blond showing a lot of leg and stretching a Fox News t-shirt to the breaking point is strapped to a wheelchair, getting an injection from an elephant in a nurse's uniform. A man in a suit clutching a CNN mike is strapped to a gurney getting tied off for his injection from a donkey also dressed as a nurse. Both reporters have expressions of orgiastic euphoria plastered on their faces. NEMO and SPIDER can be seen walking by in an open doorway.

NEMO: Are they getting medicine?
SPIDER: No, silly boy! They're getting the disease, which they will spread through the magic of televised punditry.

Panel 4- a Rube Goldberg designed bathroom. A corporate businessman sits on a toilet, pants around his ankles and reading the New York Times, with an oversized tank behind him with MONSANTO stencilled on it. The coiling pipe from the bowl leads to an outhouse that looks like the Capitol building. NEMO and SPIDER peek over from another stall to spy. A mouse in the corner holds a small placard.

(from inside outhouse): YAY!!
NEMO: B...but why?
SPIDER: So that they, in turn, can shit all over us! It's how you get all those fancy schoolbooks, and yet learn absolutely nothing!
MOUSE PLACARD: Know your school board!

Panel 5- what looks like a cheap hotel room. Lady Liberty and some fat guy are getting it on under the bedsheets. Liberty looks bored and lights a cigarette as the fat guy finishes. SPIDER covers NEMO's eyes as they walk by.

SPIDER: Nothing to see here except a lazy metaphor!
NEMO: You said there'd be pie!

Panel 6- NEMO has fallen out of bed. He sits on the floor, visibly shaken, hair mussed, trying to light a cigarette.

(from outside the bedroom): What's going on in there?!
NEMO: IT'S YOUR FAULT!

Inset panel lower right corner of page. WINDSOR MCCAY glares at WARREN ELLIS, who takes a pull from a hip flask.

MCCAY: You're a sick man.
ELLIS: You started it.

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