Friday, April 8, 2016

Campaign Comics: “Hairy Pots and the Chamber of Snake-Skins” by David Press.

Not super sure if I did this right, because I've never played a day of D&D and have no immediate plans to, so here goes...?

1.1: Just for clarification purposes our HARRY POTTER allegory is instead called HAIRY. He’ll have a shaved head and huge glasses with a BULLSEYE scar on his forehead—instead of the lightning bolt. Ron, or ROLAND, has brown hair and actually does have a rat-like face; and Hermione who will now be called HARRIET has straight strawberry-blondish hair and skin that is breaking out in a kaleidoscope of zits.
            For our purposes here let’s have the NARRATOR’S CAPTIONS framed in a yellow box with black bold font. I’m gonna call them an IBOX.
            In the first frame, it’ll be a screen cap from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets movie where Ron, Harry, and Hermione are standing in front of the column that will take them down to the Chamber of Secrets.

IBOX:                From Day 1 of their seventh grade year Hairy Pots, Roland Tibolt, and Harriet Mange didn’t know about the Chamber.
ROLAND:              Oh I don’t know about this, mates.
HARRIET:             Grow some nuts, Roland. It’s just a Transport Whirligig.

1.2: HARRIET jumps backward down the tube embedded in the sink. She’s turned around in such a way as to face up towards Hairy and Roland—she’s sticking her tongue out at them.

HAIRY:               Whirligig? That a technical term, Harriet?
HARRIET:             C’mon, scaredy cats.

1.3: Hairy PUSHES Roland down the tube.

HAIRY:               Hey!

1.4: Hairy flies through the air into the wide CHAMBER. ROLAND is pulling himself up off the floor and HARRIET has her wand raised—a bulb of light pulses and illuminates the chamber.

HAIRY:               AHHHH!
ROLAND:           GROSS!

1.5: Hairy has landed face down in the pit—it’s a miracle his glasses aren’t broken, but his face is COVERED in clear skin. I’m sorry if this makes you puke, but we can see scales in the skins.

HARRIET:          Well that was unexpected.
HAIRY:               What?

1.6: Roland and Harriet get Hairy up and they look down the hall.

HARRIET:        The chamber just leads to the school’s garbage pit.
IBOX:                Clearly today would not be a day of adventure for our heroes.


No comments:

Post a Comment

Feedback is what every good writer wants and needs, so please provide it in the white box below
If you want to play along at home, feel free to put your scripts under the Why? post for the week.