Monday, July 18, 2016

I Hate Fairyland - Writing on the Wall - Grant McLaughlin

1 - We're in a country cottage.  Five figures sit at a table in a room that is filled with books, pens, quills, paper, ink pots, and various other writing tools.  The figures are an owl with a moncole and vest, a clockwork butler, a wise old cowboy, a hobo clown, and a frog knight.  The owl is evidently in charge, as the other four look to him demurely.  All wear serious expressions.

OWL (1): Our noble guild is on the verge of extinction.

OWL (2): Those who haven't been slaughtered at her hands have renounced our life's work.

OWL (3): I put out the call.

OWL (4): We are all that's left of the proud narrating tradition.

2 - Switch angles to focus on the door of the cottage, with the gathered group in the foreground.  A knock is clearly coming from the outside, bringing concern to the group's faces.  The owl rises to answer the door.

SFX: knock! knock!

CLOCKWORK BUTLER: Who could that be?

OWL: Perhaps I spoke too soon.

3 - The owl stands at the doorway, the door open.  He looks terrified, a dark shadow falling over him.  The owl's monocle falls from his eye.

OWL: Maybe there are others who remain--

GERTRUDE (off-panel): Sorry, bub...

4 - Gertrude stands at the door, menacingly holding an axe.  Lightning cracks behind her in the distance.

GERTRUDE: Story-time's over.

4 comments:

  1. Ha! I love this. I think you captured the silly-doom aspect of the comic. Well done.

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  2. Nice with the last panel and the gleeful doom we get from this great comic. Reminds me of Darkwing Duck.

    This week, I'm kind of fixated on questions: what questions do you ask yourself when you're editing a script? Do you run a check-off list to make sure you're not falling for a nasty tendency? Or is it something simple like: are there too many words in the panel? What do you ask yourself?

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  3. Thanks for the kind words, friends.

    To your questions, David, editing is always a tricky part of it. In my initial drafts, I generally try to throw down as many words as possible (for dialogue), hoping that somewhere in the muck there will be something worth keeping. Once I have a complete draft of a script, I look over it for anything that I don't need or that might be better communicated through image alone. That's usually a lot. I find erring on the side overcutting is better than undercutting - believing in the reader to fill in blanks on all that.

    How about you? What's your approach?

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