Saturday, September 17, 2016
Donald Trump - Seussian - P. A. Nolte
1/ Donald Trump, as he would be drawn by Skottie Young or Chris Giarrusso. He's got on his suit and tie and is thrusting one arm emphatically up into the air.
A young boy named Donald once lived in New York
Amassing wealth, fame, and blonde models to pork
But discontent, he, with his housing so small
"A tower, I'll build, to rival them all!"
2/ He stands at the very top of a skyscraper still being worked on, Trump Tower, glowering down at the other buildings, cars, and people indistinguishable from such a great height.
So construction began in the heart of the city
A perch to be perched on and look down with pity
At all of the have-nots and do-nots below
The first of its kind! Cost a mountain of dough!
3/ Little Donald stands at a podium in front of the main entrance. He wields a large pair of scissors, anxious to cut the large ribbon tied around the building.
And in moved elites of all shapes and sizes
Musicians and actors and good merchandisers
They swooned at the sights and at their landlord
Until they realized... were they missing some floors?
4/ Donald pokes at the blueprints. It's a mostly complete building except for a section about a third of the way up that's merely rickety-looking supports instead of finished shops, offices, and apartments.
"Aha!", said young Donald, with mischievous glee
"Now you shall witness the cleverness of me!"
"Residents belong on the 30th floor!"
"So we skipped a few numbers and charged a bit more!"
5/ In his office, a line of people form out the door. They've come single file to air their grievances. Donald is slumped in his chair with his head on his desk. He's trying to cover himself with his arms.
This scrupuluosness did not go unnoticed
And some of the tenants began to get pissed
Then one day--
6/ Donald Trump, a more adult version, frowning at the collection of crude drawings and incoherent, slanderous rhymes. He looks over the artist's shoulder at the work on his easel.
Trump: You're fired. Get out.